Reviews
‘Satanic Hispanics’ Review: Fun at Points, But Forgets to Bring The Panic
Satanic Hispanics is an anthology film: four horror stories told by a man trapped in police custody. His crime? Being caught in the middle of a suspected cartel massacre. As the police go through his belongings, every souvenir he has from his supernatural journeys weaves a tale of death and fates even worse. All the while, a timer is ticking down: he has 90 minutes to convince them to free him before an unstoppable monster kills everyone in its path to get to him.

Satanic Hispanics. Seeing the title of this film rolling into the Shudder suggestions in the coming months will probably have every kid who grew up Latino associating memories with the words themselves.
The Cultural Impact of Satanic Panic in Latino Communities
Most of us will remember the sensationalized and dramatized stories of evil and otherworldly forces from our childhoods constantly hocked on Univision; Primer Impacto regularly reporting on witch sightings, ghosts manifesting, and conspiracy theories of the occult was a staple in a lot of our homes. Maybe you’ll recall the mentions of witchcraft rumored about in hushed tones by las viejas chismosas in your apartment building (because your neighbor in 5F is for sure doing chicken sacrifices for power and isn’t just like, I don’t know, a hoarder with a weird work schedule).
Tapping into Latin American Folklore and Modern Fears
For most of the Latino world, Satanic Panic is REAL real. So, there’s very clearly a wellspring of stories you can draw on for a horror anthology like this one, both in folklore and in more modern fears and anxieties. And while this Dread Central feature film does tap into Latin American mythology and esoteric religions well enough, it didn’t land the gut punch I was hoping for in terms of its evocative title or fun premise.
But what is that premise? Satanic Hispanics is an anthology film: four horror stories told by a man trapped in police custody. His crime? Being caught in the middle of a suspected cartel massacre. As the police go through his belongings, every souvenir he has from his supernatural journeys weaves a tale of death and fates even worse. All the while, a timer is ticking down: he has 90 minutes to convince them to free him before an unstoppable monster kills everyone in its path to get to him.
Is Satanic Hispanics Worth Watching?
Right off the bat, I’m not saying you shouldn’t watch Satanic Hispanics; if I’m covering it, chances are it’s at least somewhat worth watching, especially since it’s an anthology, and your mileage may vary depending on which segments you vibe with. I was excited by the concept, and knowing that the film’s framing device was leading to a climactic showdown helped keep me interested. But I was ultimately kind of disappointed, and while I hope the film gets a sequel, it’s mainly so they can address this one’s issues.
Those issues, mind you, are structural and hard to ignore: it’s frontloaded by what are, in my opinion, the film’s two weakest segments, which hurts the momentum of the movie when you’ve got a nearly 2-hour runtime to push through and focusing in during the first 50 minutes had me struggling to keep watching. The framing device can be awkward at points, with segues that feel forced. The dialogue there feels clunky, and is only saved by Efren Ramirez, who plays the titular Traveler. He nails the role of “mysterious man who speaks in riddles and weird lore”, and his performance is too fun for me not to like even when his exposition is ham-fisted. He has a dark tone and wiseacre delivery, which combined with his odd lines just works.
Efren Ramirez and Gabriela Ruiz Shine
In terms of performances, the only real standouts here are Ramirez, and Gabriela Ruiz as the very cool and very creepy Madre Tierra in “Nahuales”. Hemky Madera also has a very charming performance as a bumbling vampire caught out late on Halloween, and though “El Vampiro” was my least favorite of the segments, it’s no fault of his; I enjoyed him as a sort of slapstick, Dominican Bela Lugosi and hope he gets to play more roles like that in the future.
Outside of the framing device which has to take time to heat up to a fun action horror ending (with some really bad spanish butt rock and some really great creature makeup to back it up), the segments generally improve as the film progresses, but have issues in and of themselves. Demian Rugna’s segment “Tambien Lo Vi” which leads the pack really didn’t have the big touchdown moment with its ending that I wanted it to. Nonetheless, I think aesthetically it utilizes the location expertly in spite of its rushed nature, and with a larger share of the runtime would be on par with every other amazing piece of filmmaking Rugna has made.
“The Hammer of Zanzibar”: Stylish but Problematic
The segment “The Hammer of Zanzibar” has an undoubted talent behind the camera in Alejandro Brugués who makes a stylish short reminiscent of Army of Darkness and Buffy the Vampire Slayer, but its subject matter has an immature strain of humor that is violently hit or miss; beyond that, some interpretations of the segment can read as pretty offensive to the real life beliefs of diasporic African traditional religions. That is a whole other can of worms I don’t have space to get into, but felt like I should mention as a light content warning.
The best of these unsurprisingly comes from Gigi Saul Guerrero, who directs the segment “Nahuales”. If you watch this film for anything, let it be this. “Nahuales” is the chapter that most delivers on the film’s leery title, with a story centered on witchcraft, and tapping into the fear of things beyond our understanding. This time around the subject is the mythical nahuales; Mesoamerican shapeshifting monsters who stalk the land bringing bloody vengeance down on the heads of their enemies. However, it has a twist, since under all their literal grime and the human sacrifice they do, it is also a pretty culturally relevant commentary: on political corruption in Mexico, on American hegemony in the global south, and the exploitation and erasure of South American indigenous populations (as much it can comment in the time its given).
Why Satanic Hispanics Falls Short of Greatness
Had all the shorts in this collection been this stylish, this well-directed and acted, and this thematically weighty, Satanic Hispanics would have been an all-time great horror film. But the radical shift in tone between segments, while welcome in some regards, ends up hurting the film’s consistency and compounds its other issues. It holds the movie back because I can only appreciate certain segments, and it doesn’t come together as a whole feature. And personally, I don’t like having to skip through almost half of a film to get to the good parts.
It’s not a unique pitfall, since some of the V/H/S films and both ABC’s of Death movies suffer from it, with ABC’s being unwatchable for me because of this. But it is notable for anybody who plans on entering the world of Satanic Hispanics and its stories that you might not be able to get into it on the first go around. And if you do revisit this one, you’ll almost invariably end up wanting to skim through the grimoire of twisted tales rather than reading it through completely.
Satanic Hispanics will be streaming on Shudder starting March 8th!
Reviews
[REVIEW] Fantastic Fest 2025: ‘Primate’ Is the Animal-Attack-Meets-Slasher Movie You Didn’t Know You Needed

If that one scene in Nope (you know the one) wasn’t enough to convince you that owning a chimpanzee is a bad idea, Primate is here to remind you that these animals can literally rip you limb from limb. Directed by Johannes Roberts, who also co-wrote the script with Ernest Riera, the film is scheduled to release in January—and if it wasn’t on your radar before, allow me to firmly add it.
PSA: Primate Proves That Chimps Are Not Pets (But They Are Great Slasher Killers)
Primate begins with a pre-credits scene introducing us to the danger: a vet has been called to check in on a chimp named Ben that isn’t feeling so hot, only to discover the hard way that the super-strong animal has gone rabid. It’s an evocative opening, though it does create a little timeline confusion when we jump back in time a few days to follow Lucy (Johnny Sequoyah) as she returns home to Hawaii to see her family and their unusual pet.
Her late mother, we learn, worked with Ben for years before her death, and he remains a beloved member of the family, able to communicate most basic needs via the use of sign language and a special tablet. Ben is acting a little off, though, so Lucy’s father (Academy Award-winner Troy Kotsur, in a stand-out role) calls in the vet we’ve already seen die before heading out for the night.
Of course, we know that Ben has rabies, so it’s only a matter of time before he goes bananas. In the meantime, Lucy, her sister, and their friends get to living it up while they have the place to themselves. The family owns a gorgeous secluded mansion complete with a cliffside infinity pool, and if you’ve seen The Strangers: Prey at Night, you’ll know Roberts loves a pool. He quickly finds a reason to drive the young people into it and trap them there—but just because chimps can’t swim, that doesn’t mean they’re safe.
Blending Animal Attack Horror with Slasher Thrills in Primate
One of the biggest things going for Primate is its ability to blend classic animal attack horror with slasher elements. The film draws clear inspiration from Cujo, but where the Trentons were largely safe from the beast’s foaming maw (if not the sun) so long as they stayed inside their vehicle, Lucy and friends aren’t so lucky. As the tagline for Primate warns, Ben is “dangerously close to human,” which means he understands how to use tools and constantly finds creative ways to take a swipe at his prey whenever they and the audience let their guard down. The sicker the chimp gets, the more he seems to radiate a savage, all-too-human glee.
At the same time, Roberts and Riera’s script leverages the communication gap between Ben and the family to devastating effect. Ben is so close to being able to tell them what’s wrong before his rabies progresses to the point of no return, but he doesn’t quite have the language. The fact that Lucy’s father is deaf adds an additional layer to the tragedy: we see how expressive the family is able to be through non-verbal communication, yet Ben is still isolated in his misery.
Toward the climax, however, even this form of communication starts to break down as the girls’ screams go unheard. While it feels like there’s more material that could have been wrung from this theme, it’s notable that Ben goes for the mouth more than once during his rampage, including in the film’s most memorable kill. In the end, maybe all communication is meaningless when nature decides to play a cruel prank.
Miguel Torres Umba’s Incredible Performance as Rabid Chimp Ben
This tragic aspect of the story doesn’t dampen the scares or thrills. Movement specialist Miguel Torres Umba, who portrays Ben, initially imbues the chimp with lovable warmth that makes his feverish, trembling intensity all the more frightening as the sickness takes hold. It’s a remarkable performance, one that lulls the audience into a similar state of wishful thinking to Lucy as she repeatedly reaches out to Ben in the hope that some part of the pet she loved is still in there. Primate rewards that desperate desire with brutal bites, bludgeonings, and beyond.
Primate Is a Lean, Mean, Face-Ripping Machine
Animal attack horror movies have trended hard toward sharks in the last decade (a world Roberts is no stranger to, having helmed 47 Meters Down and its sequel). It’s exciting to see a new addition to this subgenre focusing on a lesser-seen aggressor, especially one that doesn’t frame its killer creature as inherently evil, but rather a victim of both a natural blight and human foolishness. Ben should never have been put in the position he’s in—but now he’s here, it’s pulse-poundingly fun to see the damage that 100+ pounds of pure muscle can do when its brain is on fire.
Primate attacks theaters on January 9.
Reviews
[REVIEW] Fantastic Fest: ‘Silent Night Deadly Night’ (2025) Is More Nice Than Naughty—In Every Sense

Remakes are tricky business. Do you attempt to recreate and risk the whole endeavor feeling unnecessary, or take things in an entirely different direction and potentially piss off hardcore fans? Director Mike P. Nelson is no stranger to this dilemma: his 2021 reboot of Wrong Turn divided audiences and critics alike. With his Silent Night, Deadly Night reboot, he’s cruising for another bruising, taking a hard left turn from both the tone and content of the original film to create something that’s fun, festive, and maybe even a little heartwarming. It won’t be for everyone, but with one Silent Night, Deadly Night remake already in the books (Steven C. Miller’s 2012 effort), it’s nice to see something at least marginally fresh coming down the chimney—even if it is dipping into the stockings of other media across genres to fill its sack.
The Silent Night, Deadly Night Reboot Is a Pole Apart from the Original—and That’s Okay
Silent Night, Deadly Night (2025) stars Rohan Campbell as Billy Chapman, who, as a child, witnessed his parents being murdered by a man dressed as Santa Claus. In Charles E. Sellier Jr.’s 1984 original, this traumatic event, combined with the brutal discipline later inflicted on Billy at a Christian orphanage, ultimately leads him to don a Santa suit and violently punish those he deems “naughty.” Nelson’s remake strips away the religious element and replaces it with a supernatural one: Billy’s urge to kill and sense for who deserves it is passed on to him by the previous killer Santa in his dying moments, and that man’s deep voice now rings in his head, guiding him every step of the way.
If that sounds a little like the plot of Dexter mashed together with The Santa Clause, it should—and Silent Night, Deadly Night isn’t just borrowing plot elements from these widely disparate pieces of media. Tonally, Nelson’s film has a lot more in common with the sly, self-aware humor of Dexter than it does with the original film’s hard, tragic edge, and its cute central romance would feel more befitting a light-hearted Tim Allen movie than a Christmas slasher. You see, in the middle of his annual killing spree (communicated via layers upon layers of bloody smears under each door of an advent killer), Billy meets Pam (Ruby Modine), an outburst-prone clerk working in her late mother’s tchotchke store. Initially only planning to pass through her small town on his way to his next kill, the nomadic Billy soon falls for Pam, ignoring the warnings of his own holly-jolly Dark Passenger.
Silent Night, Deadly Night Delivers with a Supernatural Twist
That total tonal pivot will likely alienate some fans, but for those just itching for some gory holiday fun, Silent Night, Deadly Night delivers the goods. It might be kind of a romance now, but that won’t stop Billy from burying the axe. One kill scene in particular descends into a full-blown massacre, providing a particularly cathartic target that will bring down the house. There are also plenty of not-so-subtle references to the original franchise to make fans smile, including the obligatory mention of garbage day, as well as a few nods to other Christmas slashers.
Nelson even tries to tap into the Santa suit-sparked psychosis that drove 1984’s Billy to kill. While the scene in question generates plenty of laughs, with the addition of the supernatural element, it makes little sense if you look too closely. It’s all a little less straightforward than the original, and the guiding voice in Billy’s head takes some getting used to, but if you go in looking for a good time, there’s certainly one to be found here.
Unwrap Silent Night, Deadly Night for a Killer Holiday Romp
For his part, Campbell leans in to the tongue-in-cheek material wholeheartedly, and it’s nice to see him getting another shot at an iconic slasher role after the horror community widely rejected his Halloween Ends turn (for what it’s worth, I thought Corey was the most interesting element of that mess—put the pitchforks down). His chemistry with Modine is compelling enough to keep the film moving even when it gets bogged down in the plot complications created by Billy’s quest to kill killers, and there’s something absurdly sweet about this romance between two broken people. I suspect this fresh take on Silent Night, Deadly Night will pair nicely with Tyler MacIntyre’s It’s a Wonderful Knife, itself a fun, romantic twist on a beloved older movie. There are plenty of pitch-black Christmas horror films out there for people looking for coal in their stockings. The world is bleak enough right now—I’ll enjoy a sugar cookie where I can get one.
Silent Night, Deadly Night releases in theaters on December 12.