Movies
The Conjuring Movies, Ranked
The theme for this month here at Horror Press is “Based on a True Story,” and in my eyes, no franchise better encapsulates the core tenet of that corner of the horror genre than The Conjuring Universe. Let me be very clear: the tenet in question is “This is based on abject lies made by charlatans, but someone wrote a book about it, so it counts,” but nothing wields that approach with quite as much gusto as James Wan’s 2013 movie The Conjuring and the nine-film franchise it spawned. Eight-film franchise, if you don’t count The Curse of La Llorona. But Annabelle is in it, and the guy who directed it somehow conned his way into helming two of the three proper Conjuring movies that followed, meaning he has directed more of these things than James Wan himself.
The theme for this month here at Horror Press is “Based on a True Story,” and in my eyes, no franchise better encapsulates the core tenet of that corner of the horror genre than The Conjuring Universe. Let me be very clear: the tenet in question is “This is based on abject lies made by charlatans, but someone wrote a book about it, so it counts,” but nothing wields that approach with quite as much gusto as James Wan’s 2013 movie The Conjuring and the nine-film franchise it spawned. Eight-film franchise, if you don’t count The Curse of La Llorona. But Annabelle is in it, and the guy who directed it somehow conned his way into helming two of the three proper Conjuring movies that followed, meaning he has directed more of these things than James Wan himself, so I say it counts, dammit.
Anyway, did I mention we’re ranking these movies? Grab your crucifix and make sure those shadowy corners behind you are cleared of demonic nuns, and then we’ll be ready to rock.
The Entire Conjuring Franchise Ranked
#9 The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It (2021)
This is the first Conjuring without James Wan in the director’s chair, and you can feel it. The precarious balance of a love story about aging with a Catholic mysticism-inflected legal drama requires his deft touch, and it doesn’t get it, leaving this movie as something of an illegible mess.
#8 The Nun II (2023)
Speaking of illegible messes… Michael Chaves’ follow-up to The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It (Why did they hand him the keys to the entire franchise, spinoffs and all? Who knows. I’d love to read the tell-all.) is The Nun II. This flavorless slog is only saved from being at the bottom of the list by a deliciously unhinged moment in the finale (Spoiler alert: The real hero of the movie is transubstantiation).
#7 The Curse of La Llorona (2019)
The Curse of La Llorona is the first of its kind. A big-budget Hollywood movie had never been made about La Llorona before. And frankly, it still hasn’t, because this movie makes a hash of her legend. Since when is she like… repelled by the tree that was nearby when she drowned her kids or whatever? What could have been a righteous force of angry dissent against patriarchy and colonization is converted into another boring haunted house jack-in-the-box ghostie. Linda Cardellini is great at screaming, though, somebody get her some Throat Coat, stat.
#6 Annabelle (2014)
The soft spot I have for the supremely dopey Annabelle was only enough to get it placed at No. 6. It’s still just not a very good movie, y’all, and it wastes Alfre Woodard, which is high treason as far as I’m concerned. However, the broad field of references from which it is exuberantly pulling (the Manson Family, Rosemary’s Baby, Mario Bava’s Shock, the list goes on and on) keeps you on your toes as it spins its daffy tale of parenting and terror.
#5 The Nun (2018)
The Nun is absolutely choked with gloomy atmosphere, but it’s just a random assortment of fright gags tossed everywhere. And unfortunately, none of them match the raw, unnerving power of the titular entity’s debut appearance in The Conjuring 2.
#4 Annabelle: Creation (2017)
It could maybe cool it on how many different manifestations the demon has, and it’s a bit over-reliant on CGI. However, director David F. Sandberg has pulled off the impossible, dragging this trashy subfranchise kicking and screaming toward the gliding, eerie aesthetic of the salad days of the flagship Conjuring movies.
#3 Annabelle Comes Home (2019)
Annabelle: Creation seems to enjoy the best reputation of the subfranchise, probably because people hated Annabelle so much that it felt like a breath of fresh air. But Annabelle Comes Home is full to bursting with sleepover movie energy. It’s probably the least “scary” Conjuring movie, but the sheer funhouse glee with which it throws every possible creepy crawly and ghoulie ghosty your way is hard to deny.
#2 The Conjuring 2 (2016)
James Wan sure as hell knows how to repackage some of the hoariest tropes in horror cinema history and make them fresh and exhilarating by combining his ever-so-patient creeping dread with a handful of gnarly jolts. The screenplay of this one is kind of a shambles, and the movie is way too proud of its blunt-force foreshadowing. Still, it looks gorgeous, and any film with that creepy-ass scene where the little girl’s silhouette slowly morphs into the ghost of an old man in the background of one long, sustained shot simply can’t be all bad, or even mostly bad.
#1 The Conjuring (2013)
Remember what I said about James Wan and his tropes? There is absolutely nothing in The Conjuring that is new. It is The Amityville Horror with The Exorcist crudely grafted onto the back third of it. But by pouring every ounce of creative energy he has into some stellar scares and by hiring a cast that is more than capable of bringing the unusually well-shaded characters – yes, Ed and Lorraine Warren, but the Perron family as well – he is able to elevate what could have been pretty bland material in anybody else’s hands.
Editorials
‘Ready or Not’ and the Cathartic Cigarette of a Relatable Final Girl
I was late to the Radio Silence party. However, I do not let that stop me from being one of the loudest people at the function now. I randomly decided to see Ready or Not in theaters one afternoon in 2019 and walked out a better person for it. The movie introduced me to the work of a team that would become some of my favorite current filmmakers. It also confirmed that getting married is the worst thing one can do. That felt very validating as someone who doesn’t buy into the needing to be married to be complete narrative.
Ready or Not is about a fucked up family with a fucked up tradition. The unassuming Grace (Samara Weaving) thinks her new in-laws are a bit weird. However, she’s blinded by love on her wedding day. She would never suspect that her groom, Alex (Mark O’Brien), would lead her into a deadly wedding night. So, she heads downstairs to play a game with the family, not knowing that they will be hunting her this evening. This is one of the many ways I am different from Grace. I watch enough of the news to know the husband should be the prime suspect, and I have been around long enough to know men are the worst. I also have a commitment phobia, so the idea of walking down the aisle gives me anxiety.
Grace Under Fire
Ready or Not is a horror comedy set on a wealthy family’s estate that got overshadowed by Knives Out. I have gone on record multiple times saying it’s the better movie. Sadly, because it has fewer actors who are household names, people are not ready to have that conversation. However, I’m taking up space this month to talk about catharsis, so let me get back on track. One of the many ways this movie is better than the latter is because of that sweet catharsis awaiting us at the end.
This movie puts Grace through it and then some. Weaving easily makes her one of the easiest final girls to root for over a decade too. From finding out the man she loves has betrayed her, to having to fight off the in-laws trying to kill her, as she is suddenly forced to fight to survive her wedding night. No one can say that Grace doesn’t earn that cigarette at the end of the film. As she sits on the stairs covered in the blood of what was supposed to be her new family, she is a relatable icon. As the unseen cop asks what happened to her, she simply says, “In-laws.” It’s a quick laugh before the credits roll, and “Love Me Tender” by Stereo Jane makes us dance and giggle in our seats.
Ready or Not Proves That Maybe She’s Better Off Alone
It is also a moment in which Grace is one of many women who survives marriage. She comes out of the other side beaten but not broken. Grace finally put herself, and her needs first, and can breathe again in a way she hasn’t since saying I do. She fought kids, her parents-in-law, and even her husband to escape with her life. She refused to be a victim, and with that cigarette, she is finally free and safe. Grace is back to being single, and that’s clearly for the best.
This Guy Busick and R. Christopher Murphy script is funny on the surface, even before you start digging into the subtext. The fact that Ready or Not is a movie where the happy ending is a woman being left alone is not wasted on me, though. While Grace thought being married would make her happy, she now has physical and emotional wounds to remind her that it’s okay to be alone.
One of the things I love about this current era of Radio Silence films is that the women in these projects are not the perfect victims. Whether it’s Ready or Not, Abigail, or Scream (2022), or Scream VI, the girls are fighting. They want to live, they are smart and resourceful, and they know that no one is coming to help them. That’s why I get excited whenever I see Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett’s names appear next to a Guy Busick co-written script. Those three have cracked the code to give us women protagonists that are badasses, and often more dangerous than their would-be killers when push comes to shove.
Ready or Not Proves That Commitment is Scarier Than Death
So, watching Grace run around this creepy family’s estate in her wedding dress is a vision. It’s also very much the opposite of what we expect when we see a bride. Wedding days are supposed to be champagne, friends, family, and trying to buy into the societal notion that being married is what we’re supposed to aspire to as AFABs. They start programming us pretty early that we have to learn to cook to feed future husbands and children.
The traditions of being given away by our fathers, and taking our husbands’ last name, are outdated patriarchal nonsense. Let’s not even get started on how some guys still ask for a woman’s father’s permission to propose. These practices tell us that we are not real people so much as pawns men pass off to each other. These are things that cause me to hyperventilate a little when people try to talk to me about settling down.
Marriage Ain’t For Everybody
I have a lot of beef with marriage propaganda. That’s why Ready or Not speaks to me on a bunch of levels that I find surprising and fresh. Most movies would have forced Grace and Alex to make up at the end to continue selling the idea that heterosexual romance is always the answer. Even in horror, the concept that “love will save the day” is shoved at us (glares at The Conjuring Universe). So, it’s cool to see a movie that understands women can be enough on their own. We don’t need a man to complete us, and most of the time, men do lead to more problems. While I am no longer a part-time smoker, I find myself inhaling and exhaling as Grace takes that puff at the end of the film. As a woman who loves being alone, it’s awesome to be seen this way.
The Cigarette of Singledom
We don’t need movies to validate our life choices. However, it’s nice to be acknowledged every so often. If for no other reason than to break up the routine. I’m so tired of seeing movies that feel like a guy and a girl making it work, no matter the odds, is admirable. Sometimes people are better when they separate, and sometimes divorce saves lives. So, I salute Grace and her cathartic cigarette at the end of her bloody ordeal.
I cannot wait to see what single shenanigans she gets into in Ready or Not 2: Here I Come. I personally hope she inherited that money from the dead in-laws who tried her. She deserves to live her best single girl life on a beach somewhere. Grace’s marriage was a short one, but she learned a lot. She survived it, came out the other side stronger, richer, and knowing that marriage isn’t for everybody.
Movies
The Best Horror You Can Stream on Shudder in January 2026
My New Year’s resolution is to spend more time watching my favorite app. Luckily, Shudder is not taking it easy on us this holiday season, so I may meet my quota this January. The streamer is bringing in the new year with quite a few bangers. We have classics from icons, a new title from the first family of indie horror, and a couple of lesser-known films that have finally found a home. So, I am obviously living for this month’s programming and think most of you will too. I have picked the five films that I believe deserve our collective attention the most. Get into each of them and start your 2026 off on the right foot.
The Best Movies to Stream on Shudder This Month
Carrie (1976)
A sheltered teen finally unleashes her telekinetic powers after being humiliated for the last time. Carrie is the reason I thought proms might be cool when I was a kid. This Brian De Palma adaptation is one of my favorite Stephen King adaptations. It is also an important title in the good-for-her subgenre. I cannot help rooting for Carrie White (Sissy Spacek) when I watch her snap at this prom and then head home to accidentally deal with her mom. The only tragedy of this evening is that Carrie had to die, too. I said what I said, and I will be hitting play again while it is on Shudder. This recommendation goes out to the other recovering sheltered girls who would be the problem if they had powers. I see you because I am you.
You can watch Carrie on January 1st.
Marshmallow (2025)
A shy 12-year-old gets sent to summer camp and finds himself in a living nightmare. While Marshmallow did not land for me, I know plenty of people who love it. Which makes this the perfect addition to the Shudder catalogue. I am actually excited to see more folks fall in love with this movie when it hits the streamer. If nothing else, it will help a few folks cross off another 2025 title if they are still playing catch-up with last year’s movies. It also gets cool points from me for not taking the easy route with the mystery it built. I hope you all dig it more than I did, and tell your friends about it. Perhaps you could even encourage them to sign up for the app.
You can watch Marshmallow on January 1st.
Chain Reactions (2024)
Tobe Hooper’s The Texas Chain Saw Massacre cemented his horror legacy over fifty years ago. So, it is long overdue for a documentary where horror royalty can discuss its impact on them and their careers. I have been waiting for a couple of years to hear Karyn Kusama and Takashi Miike talk about Hooper’s work and how he inspired them. So, I am super geeked that Shudder is finally giving me the chance to see this film. The streamer is also helping the nerds out by adding The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974) and The Texas Chain Saw Massacre 2 (1986) this month. If you are also an overachieving couch potato, I will see you at the finish line next week.
You can watch Chain Reactions on January 9th.
In the Mouth of Madness (1994)
An insurance investigator discovers the impact a horror writer’s books have on people. I love chaos, and John Carpenter chaos happens to be one of my favorite kinds of chaos. While we talk about The Thing and Halloween all the time, this maestro has given us plenty of horror to celebrate. In the Mouth of Madness is very much one of those titles vying for a top spot among the best of his filmography. To sweeten the batshit pot, this movie features Sam Neill. You know that he only shows up in our genre if the movie is going to be legendary. You cannot tell me this is not a Shudder priority this month.
You can watch In the Mouth of Madness on January 10th.
Mother of Flies (2025)
A terminally ill young woman and her dad head to the woods to seek out a recluse who claims she can cure her cancer. The Adams Family has been holding court on Shudder for years, so it feels right that Mother of Flies is a Shudder Original. More importantly, this fest favorite has one of the best performances of 2025. Which makes it a great time for people to finally get to see it and get in line to give Toby Poser her flowers. Whatever you think your favorite Poser role is, it is about to change when you see her as Solveig. I am being serious when I say that this movie might be the first family of indie horror at their best.
You can watch Mother of Flies on January 23rd.
New year, but same Shudder. I would not want to go into 2026 any other way, personally. I hope these horrific recommendations bring you the good kind of anxiety. Or at least distract you from the state of the world for a bit.


