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‘The Loved Ones’ Review: A Gruesome, Underrated Horror Classic

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“I’m gonna go to your house now and stab your mummy just like you did my Daddy. Then I’m gonna go find Holly and stab her in the heart just like you did to me.” Yeah, Carrie White might not be the scariest Prom Queen anymore…

A Modern Horror Gem by Sean Byrne

Directed by one of horror’s most underappreciated modern voices, filmmaker Sean Byrne (The Devil’s Candy, Dangerous Animals), The Loved Ones is a high school horror film not for the faint of heart. Starring Xavier Samuel and Robin McLeavy, the film clocks in at 84 minutes, but depending on who you ask, it could feel like a lifetime. The movie just barely crosses into the torture porn subgenre, and it basks in its bloody glory.

While its gruesome torture can be too much for less seasoned horror viewers, The Loved Ones is beyond worth the nausea if you can stomach it. The torture just on its own it may have fallen flat, as it did for many 2000s splatter flicks, but the movie is so much more. The Loved Ones is a parable on grief, a clever puzzle box of a low-budget mystery, a teen romance, a psychological nightmare, somehow kind of a zombie film, and, finally, more of a deconstruction of the torture porn subgenre than an actual entry. The Loved Ones is deeply underrated, but should be considered a horror classic.

A Quick Run-Down

The film has a relatively simple premise, but it works like a well-oiled machine in its nooks and crannies. When teenager Brent Mitchell (played by Xavier Samuels), grieving a parental loss, turns down a prom invite by the school’s resident outcast Lola, he then finds himself kidnapped, at the mercy of Lola and her creepy father (John Brumpton). Soon, a nightmare prom night of torture, bloodshed, and dark secrets ensue.

Defying Torture Porn and Conventional Antagonists

While The Loved Ones inarguably has a lot more going for it than just a plethora of nauseating visuals (which we’ll get into), it delivers on its splatter-y premise. Brent goes through just about everything a horror movie character can while somehow surviving. A heart is carved into his chest, he is stapled, stabbed, and beaten.

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The most messed up part of the movie is what’s in the basement. Brent is not the first of Lola’s victims, and from a young age, she’s been kidnapping, using a drill and hot water to boil her victims’ brains, dumbing them down into essentially zombies. It is really fucked up. Other critics may say the movie goes too far in its torture, however, I am not other critics. The movie has just enough bloodlust to satiate the genre’s biggest gore hounds, but has enough of a compelling puzzle box story to earn it. Besides, the violence is so strikingly original, you are certain not to mix this up with a Hostel knock-off.

Additionally, Lola is a BRILLIANT villain. She is somehow sympathetic through all her torturous ways, and her odd demeanor adds a sense of morbid comedy to the whole thing. Her relationship with her dad is also bizarre, and their duo feels straight out of a Herschell Gordon Lewis flick. Both the type of torture, as well as the villains, defy typical conventions of 2000s horror.

2000s Horror Catnip

The film is a product of its time in the best way possible. Like other turn-of-the-millennium classics like House of Wax and Jennifer’s Body, the film revels in alternative aesthetics of the 2000s. Heavy eyeliner, plaid on band tees, and an indie rock soundtrack make it a pretty enjoyable time capsule. The fashion, the looks, and the angst all come together perfectly to make it a nostalgic throwback to the emo era. That may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but those looking for a more demented, grounded Jennifer’s Body have found the right place.

A Grief-filled Nightmare

The Loved Ones attacks the concept of grief much more intelligently and deeply than most horror films. It does merely, as so many do, create a supernatural antagonist to stand in for grief (a la the hundreds of Babadook knock-offs we’ve seen). The movie truly understands how grief is a tidal wave, sending shock waves and ripples through friends, families, and communities.

Brent is a grief-stricken teen, working through his father’s untimely death. He plays the role with subtlety, understanding the complexity of loss in a pained, yet determined performance. He is hurt, but his pain ultimately drives him to withstand some horrific torture. Grief makes him stronger.

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A Community Shaped by Tragedy

Additionally, the waves of grief echo through the entire film. Lola’s impact on this small Australian community is seen in every character, and every moment of life in the film. For example, it is revealed that the car crash that killed Brent’s father was caused by one of Lola’s escaped victims (the person Brent almost hit). An entire subplot involving a school dance may seem pointless for most of the runtime, but it clicks at the end.  Mia (Jessica McNamee) is a depressed alt girl; her screen time as the date of awkward stoner Jamie (Richard Wilson) seems pointless. The cuts to them at the dance seem mainly existent for comic relief. But, as it is revealed, Mia is actually the Brother of Timmy Valentine, one of Lola’s victims. This twist makes her small character, and their subplot of heavy drinking and depression makes sense.

Mia’s Father, a cop, is then driven to hunt for Brent. Every little thing is connected, and the overall metaphors work beautifully. The movie, for all its pomp and frills of blood and guts, is a puzzle box of a meditation on grief, and the power it holds.

While Dangerous Animals is a fantastic return to horror for Sean Byrne, it does not quite match the hectic, brutal, and disquieting terror of The Loved Ones. It is, however, great to see him return to the big screen. One can hope that with news of his latest flick, attention will be given back to this overlooked cult classic.

The Loved Ones is available for rent.

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Julian Martin is a screenwriter, filmmaker, and horror writer. As an obsessive of the genre, he finds it exceedingly detrimental to analyze how horror impacts art, society, and politics, specifically its influence seen in alternative subcultures and queer spaces. With his screenplays such as "Eden '93" winning noteable competition accolades, articles and stories published on major sites and platforms like Collider and the NoSleep Podcast, and in-depth film analytical and workshop training at Ithaca College, Julian has an elevated approach to understanding the in's and out's of the genre. He also loves Iced Coffee and My Chemical Romance.

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‘Frankenstein’ Review: Guillermo Del Toro Is Off to the Races

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Those expecting Guillermo Del Toro’s Frankenstein to be similar to the book, or to any other adaptation, are in for something else. A longtime enjoyer of the creature’s story, Del Toro instead draws from many places: the novel, James Whale’s culturally defining 1931 film, the Kenneth Branagh version, there are even hints from Terence Fisher’s Curse of Frankenstein, and if the set design and costuming are to be believed, there are trace elements of the National Theatre production too.

The formulation to breathe life into this amalgam is a sort of storm cloud of cultural memory and personal desire for Del Toro. This is about crafting his Frankenstein: the one he wanted to see since he was young, the vision he wanted to stitch together. What results is an experience that is more colorful and kinetic and well-loved by its creator than any Frankenstein we’ve had yet, but what it leaves behind is much of its gothic heart. Quiet darkness, looming dread, poetry, and romance are set aside as what has been sold as “the definitive retelling” goes off to the races. It’s a fast-paced ride through a world of mad science, and you’re on it.

Victor Frankenstein’s Ambition and Tragedy

A tale as old as time, with some changes: the morbid talents and untamed hubris of Victor Frankenstein (Oscar Isaac) guide him to challenge death itself. Spurred by a wealthy investor named Henrich Harlander, and a desire for Harlander’s niece Elizabeth (Mia Goth), Victor uses dead flesh and voltaic vigor to bring a creature to life. His attempts to rear it, however, go horribly wrong, setting the two on a bloody collision course as the definitions of man and monster become blurred.

Guillermo Del Toro’s Frankenstein is more Hellboy in its presentation than it is Crimson Peak; it’s honestly more similar to Coppola’s Dracula than either of them. The film is barely done with its opening when it starts with a loud sequence of the monster attacking Walton’s ship on the ice. Flinging crew members about and walking against volleys of gunfire, he is a monstrosity by no other name. The Creature (Jacob Elordi) cries out in guttural screams, part animal and part man, as it calls for its creator to be returned to him. While visually impressive (and it remains visually impressive throughout, believe me), this appropriately bombastic hook foreshadows a problem with tone and tempo.

A Monster That Moves Too Fast

The pace overall is far too fast for its first half, even with its heavy two-and-a-half-hour runtime. It’s also a far cry from the brooding nature the story usually takes. A scene where Victor demonstrates rudimentary reanimation to his peers and a council of judges is rapid, where it should be agonizingly slow. There’s horror and an instability in Victor to be emphasized in that moment, but the grotesque sight is an oddly triumphant one instead. Most do not revile his experiments; in fact he’s taken quite seriously.

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Many scenes like this create a tonal problem that makes Victor’s tale lean more toward melodrama than toward philosophical or emotional aspects; he is blatantly wild and free, in a way that is respected rather than pitied. There are opportunities to stop, breathe in the Victorian roses and the smell of death, to get really dour, but it’s neglected until the film’s second half.

Isaac’s and Goth’s performances are overwrought at points, feeling more like pantomimes of Byronic characters. I’m not entirely convinced it has more to do with them than with the script they’re given. Like Victor working with the parts of inmates and dead soldiers, even the best of actors with the best of on-screen chemistry are forced to make do. The dialogue has incredibly high highs (especially in its final moments), but when it has lows, how low they are; a character outright stating that “Victor is the real monster” adage to his face was an ocean floor piece of writing if there ever was one.

Isaac, Goth, and Elordi Bring Life to the Dead

Jacob Elordi’s work here, however, is blameless. Though Elordi’s physical performance as the creature will surely win praise, his time speaking is the true highlight. It’s almost certainly a definitive portrayal of the character; his voice for Victor’s creation is haunted with scorn and solitude, the same way his flesh is haunted by the marks of his creator’s handiwork. It agonizes me to see so little of the books’ most iconic lines used wholesale here, because they would be absolutely perfect coming from Elordi. Still, he has incredible chemistry with both Isaac and Goth, and for as brief as their time together is, he radiates pure force.

Frankenstein Is a Masterclass in Mise-En-Scène

Despite its pacing and tone issues, one can’t help but appreciate the truly masterful craftsmanship Del Toro has managed to pack into the screen. Every millimeter of the sets is carved to specification, filled with personality through to the shadows. Every piece of brick, hint of frost, stain of blood, and curve of the vine is painstakingly and surgically placed to create one of the most wonderful and spellbinding sets you’ve seen—and then it keeps presenting you with new environments like that, over, and over.

At the very least, Del Toro’s Frankenstein is a masterpiece of mise-en-scène down to the minutest of details, and that makes it endlessly rewatchable for aesthetic purposes. This isn’t even getting into the effervescent lighting, or how returning collaborator Kate Hawley has outdone herself again with the costuming. Guillermo Del Toro tackling the king of gothic horror stories, a story written by the mother of all science fiction, inevitably set a high bar for him to clear. And while it’s not a pitch perfect rendering of Mary Shelley’s slow moving and Shakespearean epistolary, it is still one of the best-looking movies you will see all year.

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Perhaps for us, it’s at the cost of adapting the straightforward, dark story we know into something more operatic. It sings the tale like a soprano rather than reciting it like humble prose, and it doesn’t always sing well. But for Del Toro, the epic scale and voice of this adaptation is the wage expected for making the movie he’s always dreamed of. Even with its problems, it’s well worth it to see a visionary director at work on a story they love.

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‘The Siege of Ape Canyon’ Review: Bigfoot Comes Home

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In my home, films like Night of the Demon and Abominable are played on repeat; Stan Gordon is king. One of my favorite stories surrounding Bigfoot and Ufology is the Bigfoot/UFO double flap of 1973, which Stan Gordon has an incredible in-depth book on. The Patterson–Gimlin film couldn’t hold a flame to Stan Gordon’s dive into one of my home state’s most chronicled supernatural time periods. But as much as I love the Bigfoot topic, I’m not ashamed to say I don’t know half of the stories surrounding that big hairy beast. And one topic that I’m not ashamed to say I haven’t heard of is The Siege of Ape Canyon.

The Harrowing Events of Ape Canyon

Washington State, 1924. A group of miners (originally consisting of Marion Smith, Leroy P. Smith, Fred Beck, John Peterson, August Johannson, and Mac Rhodes) was on a quest to claim a potential gold mine. Literally. The miners would eventually set up camp on the east slope of Mount Saint Helens. Little did they know their temporary shelter would be the start of a multi-day barrage of attacks from what they and researchers believed to be Bigfoot. What transpired in those days would turn out to be one of the most highly criticized pieces of American lore, nearly lost to time and history…nearly.

I need to set the record straight on a few things before we get started. One, I don’t typically like watching documentaries. Two, I believe in Bigfoot. Three, this documentary made me cry.

Image courtesy of Justin Cook Public Relations.

Reviving a Forgotten Bigfoot Legend in The Siege of Ape Canyon

Documentarian Eli Watson sets out to tell one of the most prolific Bigfoot stories of all time (for those who are deep in Bigfoot mythology). It’s noted fairly early in the film that this story is told often and is well known in the Washington area. So then, how do people outside of the incident location know so little about it? I’ve read at least 15 books on and about Bigfoot, and I’ve never once heard this story. This isn’t a Stan-Gordon-reported story about someone sitting on the john and seeing a pair of red eyes outside of their bathroom window. The story around Ape Canyon has a deeper spiritual meaning that goes beyond a few sightings here and there.

Watson’s documentary, though, isn’t just about Bigfoot or unearthing the story of Ape Canyon. Ape Canyon nearly became nothing more than a tall tale that elders would share around a campfire to keep the younglings out of the woods at 2 AM. If it weren’t for Mark Myrsell, that’s exactly what would have happened. The Siege of Ape Canyon spends half its time unpacking the story of Fred Beck and his prospecting crew, and the other half tells a truly inspiring tale of unbridled passion, friendship, and love.

Mark Myrsell’s Relentless Pursuit: Friendship, Truth, and Tears

Mark Myrsell’s undying passion for everything outdoors inevitably led to bringing one of Bigfoot’s craziest stories to light. His devotion to the truth vindicated many people who were (probably) labeled kooks and crazies. Throughout Myrsell’s endless search for the truth, he made lifelong friends along the way. What brought me to tears throughout The Siege of Ape Canyon is Watson’s insistence on showing the human side of Myrsell and his friends. They’re not in this to make millions or bag a Bigfoot corpse; they just want to know the truth. And that’s what they find.

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The Siege of Ape Canyon is a documentary that will open your eyes to a wildly mystical story you may not have heard of. And it does it pretty damn well. Whereas many documentaries feel the need to talk down to the viewer just to educate them, Watson’s documentary takes you along for the ride. It doesn’t ask you to believe or not believe in Bigfoot. It allows you to make your own decisions and provides the evidence it needs to. If you’ve ever had a passing interest in the topic of Bigfoot, or if you think you’re the next Stan Gordon, I highly recommend watching The Siege of Ape Canyon.

The Siege of Ape Canyon stomps its way onto digital platforms on November 11. Give yourself a little post-Halloween treat and check it out!

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