Movies
The 10 Best Giallo Movies Ranked According to Their Titles
Many things come to mind when thinking about the giallo subgenre: bold colors, black-gloved killers, style-over-substance whodunits, and the like. But for yours truly, I can almost never get past thinking about the Italian genre movies’ lurid, unforgettable titles. You’re not supposed to judge a book by its cover, but can you judge a giallo by its title? Let’s find out by ranking the Top 10 giallo movies based on their titles alone.
It’s giallo month here at Horror Press. Many things come to mind when thinking about the giallo subgenre: bold colors, black-gloved killers, style-over-substance whodunits, and the like. But for yours truly, I can almost never get past thinking about the Italian genre movies’ lurid, unforgettable titles. You’re not supposed to judge a book by its cover, but can you judge a giallo by its title? Let’s find out by ranking the Top 10 giallo movies based on their titles alone.
Ranking Giallo Movies According to Their Titles
#10 Death Laid an Egg (1968)
Original Title: La morte ha fatto l’uovo
Alternate Titles: A Curious Way to Love, Death Trap, Plucked, The Sadist in Room 24
Death Laid an Egg is a perfect title, except for one pesky little problem. There’s no way the actual movie can cash the check that the title is writing. It is based around a poultry factory, which is a unique enough angle for a horror movie, but even the least-seasoned horror movie viewer around would be able to sniff out the inevitable disappointment of the title a mile away, as much fun as it is to conjure images of the madcap Salvador Dalí/Ingmar Bergman mashup it promises.
#9 A.A.A. Masseuse, Good-Looking, Offers Her Services (1972)
Original Title: A.A.A. Massaggiatrice bella presenza offresi…
Alternate Titles: N/A
Now this movie has the opposite problem from good ol’ #10. It is a poetic title that draws the reader in, but what it promises is exactly what you expect to get: a seedy little movie that’s more softcore than giallo. But it’s a concise, evocative title nonetheless. The Italian horror genre’s answer to “For sale: baby shoes, never worn.”
#8 The Strange Vice of Mrs. Wardh (1971)
Original Title: Lo strano vizio della Signora Wardh
Alternate Titles: The Next Victim, Blade of the Ripper
Now here’s where things get truly giallo-y. Who is Mrs. Wardh? Why is her name spelled like that? What is her vice? Sex? Murder? Both at the same time? What’s particularly strange about it, if so? This title is such a perfect blend of eroticism and intrigue, it essentially doesn’t matter if the movie is good or not.
#7 Seven Blood-Stained Orchids (1972)
Original Title: Sette orchidee macchiate di rosso (Seven Red-Spotted Orchids)
Alternate Titles: N/A
Another nothing-but-net giallo title. The image of delicate beauty literally being stained by violent bloodshed is a perfect evocation of one of the genre’s favorite predilections: allowing the viewer to watch some of the most stunning women in the world in decadent, deadly peril.
#6 A Lizard in a Woman’s Skin (1971)
Original Title: Una lucertola con la pelle di donna
Alternate Title: Schizoid
This is another title that promises something the movie couldn’t possibly deliver, but it’s so forward about its delirious poetic metaphor that you wouldn’t expect it to anyway. It’s straightforward and a little tawdry, but with a dollop of beauty to it, which is exactly what you want from a Lucio Fulci picture anyway.
#5 Kill the Fatted Calf and Roast It (1970)
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Original Title: Uccidete il vitello grasso e arrostitelo
Alternate Titles: N/A
This is another metaphor-forward title that can’t help but conjure up a tangled web of glorious giallo plotting. We follow a rich layabout, perhaps, with a target on their back. Potential killers around every corner. Pure deadly melodrama of the highest order.
#4 Strip Nude For Your Killer (1975)
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Original Title: Nude per l’assassino (Nude for the Killer)
Alternate Title: Tenebre braccia della morte (Dark Arms of Death)
No need for metaphors here! Strip Nude for Your Killer gets straight to the point. This is going to be a lurid, nasty movie of ill repute. But there’s nevertheless something poetic about the inclusion of the word “your” in the title, drawing the reader uncomfortably close to the action against their will like a tractor beam. It’s not just naked women and killers in this movie, you the viewer are also on the chopping block. It’s common for horror movies to feature second-person taglines to draw the viewer into the experience (“In space, nobody can hear you scream,” anyone?), but for the title to do it? And in such a delectable prurient way? Now that’s bold.
#3 Forbidden Photos of a Lady Above Suspicion (1970)
Original Title: Le foto proibite di una signora per bene
Alternate Titles: N/A
This title provokes the same kind of reaction as The Strange Vice of Mrs. Wardh, but with the added benefit of tripping tantalizingly off the tongue. It’s a work of blunt-force poetry.
#2 Twitch of the Death Nerve (1971)
Original Title: Ecologia del delitto (Ecology of Crime)
Alternate Titles: A Bay of Blood, Last House Part II, Massacre at Blood Lake, Carnage, Reazione a catena (Chain Reaction)
This one just sends a tingle down your spine, doesn’t it? It’s pure Edgar Allan Poe gothica that grabs you by the throat and proudly announces itself as a movie you won’t soon forget. As one of the bloodiest gialli on the market, which set the blueprint for many an American slasher to come, Mario Bava’s many-titled movie deserved however many rereleases it had to go through in order to reach this sublime, scintillating title.
#1 Your Vice is a Locked Room and Only I Have the Key (1972)
Original Title: Il tuo vizio è una stanza chiusa e solo io ne ho la chiave
Alternate Titles: Excite Me, Eye of the Black Cat, Gently Before She Dies
Chef’s kiss. This title has everything. Passion! Eroticism! Drama! This title takes you on a journey. Do I have any idea what it means? Hell no! But it’s a vainglorious descent into indulgent poetic grandiosity that wouldn’t be matched for sheer unalloyed linguistic exuberance until 27 years later when Fiona Apple cracked her knuckles and got to work.
Movies
‘Queens of the Dead’ Took a Bite Out of Brooklyn Horror Fest
Brooklyn Horror Film Fest kicked off its 10th year with a screening of the highly anticipated Queens of the Dead. This sparkly and zombie-fied night was presented by Horror Press and set the tone for at least two after parties. As a good queen does.
Before the movie began, director and co-writer, Tina Romero, took the stage to share that she is “very proud to be my dad’s kid, and proud to carry his torch, and super super proud to do it in a way that shows queer joy and queer resilience.” After watching the film, it’s clear Romero meant business as she expanded on the zombie world built by her dad, the genre icon George A. Romero.
A Scrumptious Evening
The opening night film was also unforgettable because it was followed by a Q&A afterward moderated by New York’s baddest emcee, Xero Gravity. Tina Thee Romero took the stage with cast members Samora la Perdida, Julie J., Tomas Matos, and Nina West. They kept the vibe fun but also addressed why this movie is especially important in dire times like these.
Nina West said, “I’m really proud that this movie is coming out specifically right now.” West explained, “We talked about how important this film is right now. How queer people, I think, are going to have the opportunity to grab onto it and hopefully feel a sense of community, a sense of self, and a reminder of how vital it is to have chosen family and the ability to have space. Watching it tonight with an audience, that’s what I’m reminded of.”
The Romero Legacy is Very Much Alive and Well
Gravity opened the talk by addressing Romero’s dad’s work, “So, Tina, your father’s legacy is invaluable to the horror community, especially the horror community of marginalized people. When I look into the audience, I see a bunch of queer people, a bunch of different skin tones, I see people with disabilities, and for that, I know we all appreciate George A. Romero’s legacy in terms of allyship.”
When the applause died down, she asked Romero what Queens of the Dead has to say about our current state in society. Romero said she felt incredibly grateful that Shudder and IFC Films are putting this movie out in 2025.
Romero elaborated, “It’s not easy to get a little indie movie out into the world. It’s so important that it’s coming out this year because what a year we have had. Holy shit.”
Romero continued, “It feels so good to have a big queer movie coming out in a time when our community is feeling really under the threat of erasure and under attack. I feel like what our movie says is we are here and we are wonderful, come along for the ride. I really hope that this movie brings a little bit of empathy. A little bit of ‘I can’t help but laugh at and love these characters.”
Romero concluded, “I really love my father. I love the films he made. It was very important to me to make sure his legacy continued in a way that said some shit and with queerness on screen.”
A Night of Glitter and Gore
During the talk back, Romero shared a lot of cool facts. One being that her and co-writer Erin Judge worked on this film for ten years. She also shared that Dawn of the Dead is her favorite movie in her dad’s franchise when Gravity pointed out a couple of nods to the movie in Queens of the Dead.
The Q&A went by entirely too quickly as the audience fell in love with this amazing crew. However, the love and community spilled into the bar area afterward. People were given the opportunity to thank everyone for their work and tell them they loved the film. People were offered penis-shaped cakes, which is a fun gag from the film. Attendees were also given a chance to get a little bloody at the hands of local makeup artist Dime. They applied bite marks and blood to everyone who wanted to feel like they were a part of the hottest zombie movie of the year.
It was another scrumptious evening in Brooklyn. It also left many of the audience with an axe wound right in the heart. I’m excited to see how Brooklyn Film Fest follows this movie, and I will be in the bar area this weekend, waiting to see.
Queens of the Dead will slay in theaters on October 24.
Movies
The Worst Blumhouse Movies and Why They Miss the Mark
I feel like I’m always taking swings at Blumhouse Productions and would like to explain why I’m usually frustratedly screaming into a mic, “For whomst?!” My relationship as a horror fan with most of the movies this company produces cannot be summed up in quick, snide comments and eyerolls. It’s bigger than that because when Blumhouse gets it right, they get it right. Get Out, Us, Creep, Creep 2, Happy Death Day, Freaky, M3GAN, and Drop are some of my favorite movies from the last 10 years. The Paranormal Activity franchise is the reason I show up for found footage films today.
However, while the mission to seemingly greenlight anything is good on paper, it does lead to some questionable films. Some projects feel irresponsible to fund, and some that are just bad make up the majority of their library. For every diamond, we get a bunch of movies that leave us scratching our heads and wondering if the obvious conversations were not being had. Which is why I picked four Blumhouse movies I have legitimate beef with. I think these are prime examples of why I have a hard time getting excited when the company’s PR starts up for a new project. I’m also respectfully asking if there are things in place to avoid these issues and concerns in the future.
The Exorcist: Believer
Two girls disappear in the woods and return to their families, who soon learn they are possessed by an evil entity. My surface problem with this Blumhouse movie is that they learned nothing from greenlighting the Halloween trilogy and put the cart before the horse again. However, my main grievance is that I was led to believe this would be a Black-led Exorcist movie. That would have been groundbreaking in this almost exclusively white franchise. More importantly, Leslie Odom Jr. and Lidya Jewett were more than capable of leading this movie. So, why were they shoved into the margins? We had a double exorcism and gave the non-Black child most of the cool things to do. The film also made Odom Jr.’s character the chauffeur for Chris MacNeil, who was shoehorned in for fan service and given nothing important to do. The Exorcist: Believer was unbelievably bad to boot.
Dashcam (2021)
Two friends livestream the most terrifying night of their lives while on a road trip. This movie would have done fine because it was from the team that brought us Host. As we were still in pandemic mode, many of us were curious to see what they would do next. So, there was a lot of face cracks when it came out that problematic Twitter personality Annie Hardy would be basically playing herself in the film. From her political stances, COVID denial, racist rants, and that time she turned a pride flag into a swastika on Twitter, she’s very blatantly a person who does not need a bigger platform.
It’s irresponsible to allow a movie to use her as stunt casting in a Blumhouse production. Again, this movie would have been better off without her because it would have ridden the steam of Host. Instead, it turned people off, and some refused to see it or review it.
They/Them (2022)
A group of teens at an LGBTQ+ conversion camp suffer psychological torture at the hands of the staff while being murdered by a masked killer. I feel there were too many cis people weighing in on this movie. I personally watched an awful person who masquerades as a journalist leap into Twitter conversations where Trans and non-binary people were discussing why this movie wasn’t it. So, I chose to keep my thoughts to myself and listen to the community, who should get a say.
I encourage you to do the same. Here is the Horror Press review by Bash Ortega. I also encourage you to read Kay Lynch’s essay at Bloody Disgusting. Consequence of Sound also had a review that is worth reading. While this was one of the movies under the Blumhouse banner that had its heart seemingly in the right place, we know intention and impact are not the same thing.
Soft & Quiet (2022)
An elementary teacher meets with other white supremacists and then commits a hate crime. This movie felt like a bunch of shocking events strewn together, and I wanted my money back for this rental. I have no idea how this film came to be what it is. Personally, I hope there is a version that doesn’t feel like racial trauma porn somewhere, but this is not it. I kept wondering who this movie is for, and the internet confirmed it wasn’t for POC. With all the ways to capture white supremacy on film, this is what they did? I feel this is the most irresponsible movie Blumhouse has subjected me to. It’s the reason I no longer get excited when I hear a filmmaker I am rooting for is working with the company.
In Closing…
I know I come across as flippant when I drag most of Blumhouse’s films. However, it stems from a place of concern and frustration. Bad movies like Firestarter, Unhuman, Night Swim, and Imaginary are one thing. These movies that clumsily handle important topics that are the reason I’m usually waiting for their titles to hit streaming. Whether they’re putting Black leads in the backseat, greenlighting movies where internet trolls are being given roles, or adding to the canon of racial trauma porn, I’m tired. I don’t know how to fix it because I don’t know if it’s a lack of support or interference regarding the writers and directors.
I don’t know if it’s just quantity over quality leading to some messy and unnecessary movies making it through the cracks. However, if Jason Blum can unpack why M3GAN 2.0 flopped, then it would be cool for him to unpack what he’s learned from the movies that should actually be cause for concern. As a film girl, I would love to see these Blumhouse choices laid out like case studies. Whatever lessons learned and actionable items taken to not make these mistakes again, could be beneficial to other production companies that are also struggling. All I know is an honest investigation is needed if they’re going to keep yeeting films out at this rate. We want to root for all horror. However, it’s hard to do that if we’re wondering who is (or is not) in the room for so many important conversations that need to happen.


