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‘Tales from the Crypt’ Top 10 Episodes of All-Time, Ranked

Horror Press ranks the ten best episodes of Tales From The Crypt.

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Greetings Boils and Ghouls! Growing up I was a big fan of Star Trek: The Next Generation. One week I saw in TV guide that Patrick Stewart was hosting a show I had never heard of called Saturday Night Live. In my effort to stay up late enough to watch the show, I started to channel surf until I came upon another show called Tales From The Crypt.

I was instantly hooked on the horror, comedy, and naughty glimpses of nudity. Did I stay up long enough to watch Captain Jean-Luc Picard talk about sexy cakes? Yes I did, but the following week I eagerly returned to spend time with my pal the Crypt Keeper.

Fast forward 30 years: I host a podcast called Dads From The Crypt, where I am joined by two other spooky dads to review horror and sci-fi anthology movies and series, such as Tales From The CryptBlack Mirror, and Creepshow… and also to give questionable parenting advice.

After reviewing the entire bloody series, here is my list of the best Tales From The Crypt episodes.

The Ten Best Episodes of Tales From The Crypt

10. Skin Deep: Season 6, Episode 2

For a show known for pushing the boundaries of sex and violence, this one has both on full display. Expertly directed by William Malone (House on Haunted Hill (1999), Feardotcom (2002)) and starring the electric Sherrie Rose, this episode should give pause to anyone who considers going home with a mysterious girl at a party.

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9. Cutting Cards: Season 2, Episode 3

The legendary Walter Hill (48 Hrs (1982), The Warriors (1979)) brings us the shortest episode in the series that packs a massive punch. Lance Henrickson and Kevin Tighe play two gamblers locked in an escalating battle of will and luck. These two chew the scenery with the ferocity of the shark from Jaws, and the absurdly funny resolution is an ending for the ages.

8. House of Horrors: Season 5, Episode 7

Ever wanted to watch Wil Wheaton, Keith Coogan, and Jason London scrub a floor with toothbrushes in their underwear while being berated by Kevin Dillion? This episode has you covered! Directed by Bob Gale (From the Back To The Future franchise- look for the interview I did with him!), this episode involves a fraternity hazing prank that you can really sink your teeth into. Think Animal House meets Night of the Demons.

7. Dig That Cat… He’s Real Gone: Season 1, Episode 3

This was one of the three episodes (The Man Who Was Death, And All Through The House…) that kicked off the series on Jun 10, 1989. All three of them are excellent and could easily make anyone’s top 10 list, but I went with this one for the sake of variety. Directed by the late great Richard Donner (Superman, The GooniesThe Omen), this episode really showcased the series’ dark humor. Many Tales From The Crypt segments are set in a creepy circus, a great setting for shady stories of the macabre. This one is the best, featuring Joe Pantoliano as a death-defying performer who pushes his luck. His and Robert Wuhl’s performances are so big they could pop out of your screen. Donner crafts a nasty, comedic tale that sets the tone for the rest of the series. 

6. Television Terror: Season 2, Episode 16

Real life media personality and verifiable loudmouth Morton Downey Jr. parodies his own career in this take of the BBC’s Ghostwatch. Part terrifying haunted house story, part tongue-in-cheek commentary on the state of the media, this episode chills and tickles to the bone. Legendary stuntman Charlie Picerni directs this fan-favorite episode with a steady, imaginative hand.  

5. Dead Right: Season 2, Episode 1

Kicking off season 2, the increased budget is immediately noticeable with improved sets and even the craftsmanship of the Crypt Keeper puppet itself. Demi Moore displays her charisma in this classic episode months before Ghost would make her a household name. Jeffery Tambor dons a plethora of prosthetics to play a character who is uglier on the inside than he appears on the outside. Director Howard Deutch (Pretty In Pink) lands this campy, creepy crypt tale.

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4. The New Arrival: Season 4, Episode 7

This is the scariest episode of the entire series. When I first saw it as a kid, I was so scared I kept the lights on when I went to bed. David Warner plays a radio child psychologist who quickly gets in way over his head when he is invited to help a mysterious, disturbed child. Zelda Rubenstein is excellent as always, and Robert Patrick has a fun cameo in this tight terror tale from Peter Medak (The Changeling). Think Frasier Crane visits the house in The People Under The Stairs.

3. “Death of Some Salesman”: Season 5, Episode 1

Bordello of Blood may have been underwhelming, to say the least, but director (and longtime Tales From The Crypt producer) Gil Adler proved he had the chops with two classic Tales episodes: “Death of Some Salesmen” and “What’s Cookin’.” “Death of Some Salesmen” gets the nod here for an incredible performance by the iconic Tim Curry. He plays all three members of a demented family at once, sometimes even in the same shot. Effects master Todd Masters deserves major credit for the exceptional makeup. Ed Begley Jr. is the titular salesman trying to make the deal of a lifetime. This episode provides the gore, humor, and thrills that fans crave.

2. “Top Billing”: Season 3, Episode 5

To kill or not to kill? That is the question this episode seeks to answer, and boy is it a killer time! Jon Lovitz gives a surprising performance as a down-on-his-luck actor hoping to breathe life into his career by auditioning for the lead in a production of Hamlet that is way off-Broadway. Todd Holland directs this quintessential Tales From The Crypt episode, with a colorful cast including Bruce Boxleitner, John Astin, and Louise Fletcher. The shocking twist will floor you, and the gory effects gag in the final scene will leave you shaken.

1. “Yellow”: Season 3, Episode 14

My choice for best Tales From The Crypt episode of all time was not meant to be a Tales From The Crypt episode. At the height of the series’ success, there was a plan to make a more wartime/action-oriented spin-off series. “Yellow” was meant to kick off the series and was given a big budget and longer run time. When the spinoff plans were canceled, this episode and a few others were repurposed into the main series. Lucky for us, this Robert Zemeckis (Back To The FutureForrest Gump) episode transcended the show’s status quo. The series hallmarks are still present, with gory effects thanks to the World War I setting and a morality lesson that resonates today. Real-life father and son Kirk and Eric Douglas play a father and son on a tragic trajectory that feels so authentic that they barely seem to be acting. Dan Akroyd and Lance Henrikson round out the cast of this fantastic, heart-wrenching episode, which is one of the best episodes of TV ever broadcast.

I hope you enjoyed my list! Let us know your favorite Tales From The Crypt episodes on social media! If you want to know which episodes my co-hosts chose, you can listen to our July 2nd, 2023 episode, where we shared/compared/trashed each other’s list. You can find us on YouTube or your podcast app of choice.

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The Best Moments From Each Season of ‘Stranger Things’

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Now that we are heading into the last season of Stranger Things, it is hard to not remember the good times. Much like any goodbye, it feels too soon and is giving us a case of the nostalgia glasses. We all know that not all seasons were created equally. Yet, the wildly popular series managed to keep enough of us invested these last 10 years. It is an undeniable pop culture sensation that will not be forgotten anytime soon. It is also honestly one of the few shows that makes it hard to break up with Netflix. So, I decided to look back and highlight the best parts of each season. Grab aJustice for Barbt-shirt and take this walk down memory lane with me.

Our Favorite Moments From Stranger Things

Season 1: Eleven

Season one of Stranger Things brought us many memorable moments that reshaped pop culture. Joyce Byers’ (Winona Ryder) makeshift Ouija board on the wall, used to communicate with her missing son, was a major one. However, this was also the only season that allowed Eleven (Millie Bobby Brown) to be a badass. Which is why she is the best part of Stranger Things’ first season. Watching her showcase her powers as she sought out waffles was a mood. A relatable queen if there was one, right? From using her telekinetic powers to stop annoying diner fans to flipping vans chasing after her and the crew, this season set Eleven up to be a powerful badass. That is even before we get into her mind tricks, which we still have some questions about. Sadly, subsequent seasons have yet to follow through on the promise this one gave us. I could write a whole series about how Eleven is a reservoir of untapped potential in the next three seasons.

Season 2: Steve and Dustin

I think Max (Sadie Sink) is one of the best additions to the show, and I felt Bob (Sean Astin) deserved a better arc. However, only one arc warms my cold little heart when I think about this second season. Few things bring as much joy to Stranger Things fans as the unshakable bond between Steve and Dustin. Season 2 is where this unlikely duo found each other, and that is why they are the best part of this season for me. Steve (Joe Keery) and Dustin (Gaten Matarazzo) bring out the best in each other. Interestingly enough, the actors seem to have also found themselves formidable scene partners. Whether Dustin is bringing Steve up to speed or Steve is giving Dustin tips on how to handle girls, these two stole our hearts at multiple points this season. My personal favorite is when Steve steps in to save Lucas from Billy the Racist, and Dustin cheers him on (while he has the upper hand). Dare I say, this relationship has become the heart of the show.

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Season 3: Robin Coming Out to Steve 

This season of Stranger Things introduced quite a few new characters to kill, like all the other seasons. However, Robin (Maya Hawke) seemed cooler than most, and we were silently rooting for her to make it. While her easy dynamic with Steve made us worry that she would become another part of the Steve, Nancy, and Jonathan saga, we had nothing to worry about. When Steve professed his feelings to Robin, she surprised us all and came out. This led to Steve surprising us by picking up a more age-appropriate best friend in what is one of the sweetest moments of the show. Aside from becoming Steve’s platonic girlfriend, Robin also went on to become the first openly gay character in the ridiculously large main cast. So, while this season isn’t my favorite, I’m very grateful it brought us this scene and this pairing.

Season 4: Eddie Munson Meets Erica Sinclair

Eddie Munson (Joseph Quinn) is probably part of everyone’s favorite moments from the fourth season of Stranger Things. While many people will probably cite his cafeteria entrance, his moment in the woods with Chrissy (Grace Van Dien), or the infamousChrissy, wake up,those aren’t my favorite moments. Because this show taught us that Quinn is a scene thief, and he turned this season’s throwaway character into a pop culture moment, there is plenty to choose from. However, my nerdy ass’s favorite scene is when my two favorites faced off in Dungeons & Dragons. 

Resident scene thief Erica (Priah Ferguson) finally found someone who could keep up with her when she showed up to this game. Watching her and Eddie match wits before getting down to an epic game of DnD that spawned numerous fan theories about how Eddie could come back for season 5 is priceless. He forced Dustin and Steve’s duo to become a trio, played Metallica’s Master of Puppets in The Upsidedown, and broke our hearts with his death. However, I choose to remember him alive and becoming begrudgingly impressed with the little girl who takes no prisoners. I would have watched them play this game for hours and lived my best nerdy life.

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We’re Looking Forward to Season 5 of Stranger Things

So, those are my fondest memories from each season of Stranger Things. Feel free to let us know your favorite moments and your predictions for the fifth and final season on social media!

The first four episodes of Stranger Things: Season 5 hit Netflix on Wednesday, November 26. Let us know if you plan to watch as they air. Or if you are going to wait until the end of the year to binge the whole season.

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Why ‘Stranger Things’ Fans Cannot Acknowledge Billy is a Racist

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A new season of Stranger Things is upon us, and unfortunately, that always brings some baggage with it. As someone who has watched the show since it premiered on Netflix in 2016, I have witnessed the highs, lows, and questionable moments in real time. I have also seen this show unwittingly bring out the worst in its fandom. While I have many thoughts about all the problematic noise that surrounds the series, I am here with a very specific gripe today. I am not going to hold your hand when I say Billy Hargrove (Dacre Montgomery) is a racist. However, I will unpack some of the reasons I think it’s interesting that this fanbase (and some of the actors in this ridiculously large cast that should have been trimmed seasons ago) refuse to state the obvious.

Billy Hargrove Never Hides It

I get it. Billy Hargrove is hot when we first meet him in season 2. He looks like the typical ’80s heartthrob made famous by hotties of that bygone era. He could’ve easily been another Brat Pack actor next to Emilio Estevez, Rob Lowe, and Judd Nelson. However, all of that goes out of the window when we see how he abuses his step-sister, Max (Sadie Sink). We soon discover the bad boy image is not an act but simply one layer of this sociopath. Things quickly escalate in this season of Stranger Things, and Billy becomes the racist that Lucas (Caleb McLaughlin) will have to face this time out.

While the rest of his supposed friends are battling supernatural evils, Lucas always ends up the target of local racists. I have given up on his sidequests being something less targeted, or for anyone but his little sister Erica (Priah Ferguson) to ever stick up for him. The squad will battle Vecna, but Lucas will have to fend off some version of Mike Pence as a child.

Remember Script Analysis?

Anyways, the Duffer Brothers make it very obvious that Billy is an awful human. He even tells Max,There are certain types of people in this world that you stay away from, and that kid, Max, that kid is one of them. You stay away from him, you hear me? Stay away.This is before he decides to start taking a more hands-on approach with Lucas, much like he does with Max. However, too many fans like to paint the narrative that Billy isn’t a racist sociopath. They need him to be misunderstood, even broken, and would like to blame his abusive dad for the trauma he inflicts on his sister and one of the very few Black kids in town. As if all abused kids go on to be MAGA, and that pipeline is to blame for where we are now.

This isn’t helped by the actor also trying to get his character off the hook. His co-star’s comments on his acting being purposely misinterpreted is also another issue with this conversation. You can complement the complexities of a performance without excusing the character’s behavior. After all, villains can make for compelling TV when utilized correctly. Many viewers who want to romanticize this monster might not realize what they are doing. However, I cannot help but see it because I live in a world that loves to rewrite the facts.

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Have You Watched the News?

Billy is much like all the other white guys who do horrendous things. Isms beget isms. Which is why when we see him level up from abusing Max to saying all of the racist parts aloud, I was not surprised. I was also not surprised at how much of the Stranger Things fandom is okay with him beating up on children. Society hates women and will always find a reason to justify racism. So, people can forgive and downplay what Billy does. That’s why many fans were happy to see him make his guest appearance in season 4. Meanwhile, the rest of us are being reminded that the internet, and this fandom specifically, are overwhelmingly white places.

A Tale of Two Actors

To counter Stranger Things fans’ love of Billy the Racist, let us look at how Dacre Montgomery gets treated compared to Caleb McLaughlin. McLaughlin is a member of the main cast and has been with the show since day one. However, his lines at cons are considerably emptier than his white counterparts. In the beginning, people pretended it wasn’t anti-Blackness. White fans claimed they didn’t like him because his character was mean to Eleven in the first season. I could write another essay on how he wasn’t mean, and even if he was, actors are not their characters. However, it doesn’t matter because we all know racism is the reason.

Meanwhile, Montgomery does very well. All of the people yelling about his character being misunderstood make their way to his table like he’s giving away money. How many times did we watch Billy abuse Max in various ways? How many times did we watch him abuse Lucas and escalate it to the point that only the most dense among us could miss the obvious racism on display? Yet, people still want those pictures and autographs. Coincidence?

Why This Bugs Me

As someone who cannot quit this show, I have been very vocal about my issues with Stranger Things. The refusal to kill any of the way too large main cast remains one of my biggest pet peeves. The Duffer Brothers having a hard time understanding that writing a period piece doesn’t necessarily mean you are writing for the audience of that era is also a bone of contention. Specifically, when Jonathan Byers (Charlie Heaton) took photos of Nancy (Natalia Dyer) undressing without her knowledge. In today’s context, we understand that it is assault and a severe invasion of privacy and no longer let that slide.

I am also salty about how every racist who is an aspiring Fox News reporter in Hawkins, Indiana, finds Lucas each season. Which is why it is so wild that I think the biggest issue with Billy Hargrove is how many fans of the show receive him.

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What It Says About Society

I think Billy could’ve been written with a little more subtlety. I am also again very tired of Lucas’ storyline always being about racism and attempted hate crimes. Why can’t he have magical fights in The Upsidedown like everyone else? Yet, what really salts my tines is the internet’s willingness to overlook bigotry and excuse hatred. It’s extra triggering as I am trying to survive this second Trump term. I watched this country fail as fools tweeted,all the candidates are the same.White feminism allowed hateful relatives a seat at the holiday tables after voting away the few rights most of us had. Meanwhile, Judy wanted to wear a blue bracelet to let you know she cares. However, she doesn’t care enough to be serious about any actual activism. The Stranger Things fandom is unsurprisingly a mirror of society.

The same people who look at white male terrorists and blame the girls who wouldn’t go to prom with them. Or the ones who think the Black victims of police brutality might be to blame for the cop’s reaction. Those are the people who don’t understand that Billy is a raging racist. I think this is one Stranger Things character that the Duffers might have put the most thought behind. It’s a shame the toxic fandom surrounding the show swallowed him up and learned nothing.

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