Respool that cassette of the damned—V/H/S/ is back with another abhorrently good anthology.
The V/H/S/ franchise has a special place in my heart. Beyond the fact that it was the subject of the very first article I wrote for Horror Press about a year ago with the release of the deadly fun V/H/S/94, I got into anthology horror films and television back in 2015 thanks to V/H/S/2, which is still my favorite in the series. I couldn’t be more excited about the upcoming sequel that’s been greenlit, V/H/S/85, and I think this franchise’s infinite potential is always waiting to be tapped like a tree full of gorey, wildly directed sap.
Is V/H/S/99 Truly Terrifying?
All this is to say, I try not to let my status as an admittedly biased fan cloud my judgment on these films. I go into these movies expecting high-quality shorts that are fun to watch, and our latest installment in the franchise, V/H/S/99, succeeds on that front.
The movie isn’t pants-wettingly terrifying, and I’ll be honest, it isn’t nearly as scary as V/H/S/94, but what it is, is successful in giving you creative horror tales by new visionaries of the genre who have stories to tell in spades. So, how do these shorts stack up to the tall order given?
Claustrophobic Horror at Its Finest
The second segment, “Suicide Bid,” is a prime example of how this series can construct a scary scenario with a limited set and location, evoking the vibes of an old Tales From The Crypt story. The claustrophobic conceit and the ending to this segment just washed me in the feeling of someone holding a flashlight under their face and saying, “And they were never seen or heard from again!” before giving a ghostly oooh. It was lovable camp. “The Gawkers,” the fourth entry, utilizes the found-footage aspect of the movie to the fullest, with the absolutely terrible young boys filming it, acting extremely accurately. Along with those peeping toms’ performance is a twist that results in a surprisingly good-looking creature reveal and a satisfying ending.
A Haunted House Thrill Ride
The fifth and final short, “To Hell and Back,” was written and directed by Joseph and Vanessa Winters, whom I praised, and they didn’t disappoint here either. I’ve described Terrifier 2 as eating a whole bag of fun-sized Halloween candy really fast and then watching a whole bunch of slasher movies at once. I think “To Hell And Back” is similar as a segment because it feels like running through a really fun haunted house where the scare actors are really into the role they’re playing this year (shout out to returning Winters collaborator Melanie Stone!). Not to mention that the location scouting they did for this was beyond wicked.
“Ozzy’s Dungeon”: The Standout Segment of V/H/S/99
But above the rest, “Ozzy’s Dungeon,” the third segment by musician Flying Lotus and writer Zoe Cooper, is genuinely an incomparable short. The closest thing you could put it up against is maybe the best of the Adult Swim “Informercials” episodes, and even then, it doesn’t do Zoe Cooper and Fly Lo’s nasty brainchild justice with how well it recaptures the late 90s children’s television vibes, with a much darker and gross slant. It’s a surrealist horror comedy version of Legends of the Hidden Temple, with a dash of body horror before we get into a violent home movie with a bonkers ending, and it’s perfect. It may just be my favorite segment of all the V/H/S/ films for how truly, and there’s no other way to put it, batshit insane it is. It’s wonderful!
The Disappointing “Shredding” Segment
You may be saying to yourself, “Second. Third, fourth & fifth segments. Well, what about the first segment Luis?”. And I now have to rip the Band-Aid off and say frankly…
I did not like “Shredding.”
Though the concept was a good one, and I thought the closing of it was goofy fun, the constant attempts to mask cuts with static-filled, garbled transitions are violently distracting and hurt the pacing of the segment. The constant darkness and everything being close up is accurate to how some dumb teenagers would film their antics in an abandoned venue but it doesn’t make for a great watching experience.
V/H/S/99: A Worthy Addition to the Franchise
And I say this to make the point that even though it was rough to get through, the rest of this movie is great! You need to give it a chance, and hell, you may even like “Shredding” yourself, so don’t let this review dissuade you. I say it as often as I can: my reviews and I are not here to tell you not to watch movies, just to let you know what to expect when you park yourself into the drive-in.
While I missed the old framing device of the previous movies, V/H/S/99 is still a more than worthy contender in the franchise’s legacy. It doesn’t take itself too seriously and is firmly tongue-in-cheek for most of its runtime, and it’s better for it. Bloody, strange, and exceedingly inventive in its madcap horror show presentation, I find that every V/H/S/ film leaves me wondering what hellishly fun chapters they will show us next. And V/H/S99 is no different.
V/H/S/99 will be available to stream on Shudder beginning October 20th, 2022.