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I’ll Never Let Go, Drac: The Boulet Brothers’ Dragula S4 Ep5 “Ghostship Glamour” Recap

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All aboard, Uglies! We begin this week with a despondent tale set on the shores of the cold, cerulean sea. An ethereal voice recites a poem about a magical shell that will save oneself from misery and despair if your soul is bared unto it. Eternal happiness will be yours. A desperate man unearths this shell and follows its command. He lay in the sand with a twisted, euphoric grin on his face and is carried into the depths by the wraith-like Boulets, who emerge from the waters.

The Challenge: Our favorite catty little cadavers are sailing the high seas in the Ghostship of Glamour challenge. Glamour, if you remember, is one of the three tenants of The Boulet Brothers’ Dragula, and they must serve it in lost-at-sea abundance during a lipsync performance to the Boulet’s single “Wicked Love.” The newest Fright Feat tasks them with finding a key hidden in the boudoir: Whoever finds it may choose to save themselves from Extermination or put one of their fellow monsters up instead. After the boudoir is frantically turned upside down – and we are graced with Zavaleta’s angry masc4masc impersonation – Jade finds it, and her frenemy Betty is presumably screwed. Jade then proclaims herself to be a medium and proceeds to perform a silly seance in which she reads some of the monsters, including Saint’s tacky biscuit heels. Though easy to wade the shady Seas of Jolie, no one is safe from the tidal wave to come, and everyone must prepare.

The Drama: The dramatics swiftly resume once the remainder of Glam Rot returns to the boudoir. Jade is met with a “meh” from Zavaleta, Betty is given the cold shoulder from former friend Jade, and Sigourney receives perhaps too harsh of criticism from Betty; she suggests that, as a woman, Sigourney was given the rare chance to lead a group of drag queens and her failure is therefore compounded. Is this fair? Probably not, but Bitter Betty has unapologetically evolved into Petty Betty. Of course, the hateful Jetty (Jade/Betty) bickering continues, too. Insisting Jade is hiding her true colors, Petty B. wants Jade to reveal the bitch that she (supposedly) is. Be careful what you wish for, girl, because these words will come back to haunt you.

 Floor Show & Judgment: The Boulets make a splashy entrance crowned in lethal diving helmets from 20 leagues below. In a comedic aside, seeing the pair break from their typical cool and collected selves, they discuss their regret in wearing something “fucking really uncomfortable” on their heads – fashion is pain, Uglies! A chilling floor show begins, and something about the Boulet’s song, joined with the ghostly visuals, cause this one to stand out. Before judgment begins, Jade is asked what she will do with her key, and after being pushed to her limit, mama is not playing it cool: Betty is automatically up for Extermination, and Jade is safe. With that band-aid ripped off, it’s time to learn who else has been trapped under the waves. Saint’s worst nightmare comes true, and despite being praised for her fabulous captain’s lewk, the win remains out of reach. Thus, the glamorous ghost and siren of the seven seas, Sigourney wins the top prize and beats out Dahli – much to the chagrin of Zavaleta. This leaves Zava (who underperformed), Betty, and Hoso (whose glamour is up for interpretation in a goddess-inspired look), as the exterminees. What follows is a Cauldron visit not unlike a Real Housewives brawl: Saint whines over being safe; Hoso uncharacteristically loses her composure and snaps at her competition; Zavaleta thinks Sigourney’s win is undeserved despite it being a glamour challenge (jealous much?); Betty is furious at Jade for being the bitch she asked her to be; Jade and Zavaleta unintelligibly yell at one another like gay mice. Haute Mess Express!

 Extermination: The bottom three are led to a beach where they must pop a squat in the presumably frigid water and attempt to look fierce on some rocks. The results are mixed, and they all look miserable. Petty Betty wakes up alone, and a familiar shell is nearby in the sand. She speaks into it and is carried away to eternity.

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 Quote of the Episode: “This seance would be better if Jade knew how to read a bitch.” -Bitter Betty

 Honorable Mention: Even though she won, Sigourney wasn’t given fair praise for doing so. She is the glamazon of the season, and to be frank; the other monsters don’t always serve the horror and filth they criticize her for lacking (especially compared to earlier seasons).

 Rating: My favorite floor show so far is followed by Housewives level drama that’s reached its boiling point. (9/10 Unsinkable Ships)

READ OUR EPISODE 6 RECAP HERE

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Alex Warrick is a film lover and gaymer living the Los Angeles fantasy by way of an East Coast attitude. Interested in all things curious and silly, he was fearless until a fateful viewing of Poltergeist at a young age changed everything. That encounter nurtured a morbid fascination with all things horror that continues today. When not engrossed in a movie, show or game he can usually be found on a rollercoaster, at a drag show, or texting his friends about smurfs.

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The Creep Tapes: “Brad” (S1E4)

If The Creep Tapes aren’t automatically greenlit for a second season, someone is making a mistake. These episodes have endless replayability. Each time you watch, you’ll find something new. You will see moments where something clicks in Josef’s head that you missed the first time; you will see when he makes split-second decisions you may have missed. The easiest way to put my thoughts into a phrase is that this franchise is lightning in a bottle.

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Josef (Mark Duplass) continues his reign of terror with the best episode in the entire series so far. We’ve seen Josef trap people in a snowy mountain cabin, bait a birdwatcher into an oxygen-deprived fate, and get a gotcha journalist. So what could he do next? How about trapping a true crime filmmaker into a nightmare out of his own films?

Brad (Josh Ruben) is a washed-up true-crime filmmaker who hasn’t had a hit in years. He is invited by Josef to a gorgeous house and offered to hear a pitch that’ll change everything. What is the pitch? Document true crime as it occurs. After some hemming and hawing, Brad agrees to participate in this odd experiment. Little does Brad know that he may end up more than a documentarian.

Why is this my favorite episode? To start, Josh Ruben. I love Josh Ruben. From his hysterical appearances on Game Changer to his harrowing performance in A Wounded Fawn, Ruben is one hell of a talented actor. But he’s more than just an actor; he’s also a great horror director. His written/directed hit horror comedy Scare Me delights with frights, while Werewolves Within was a more mature, albeit still funny, directorial feat. Simply put, whatever Josh Ruben touches turns to gold.

Secondly, the story. Episode 4, “Brad,” has one of the best stories of the series. Imagine you are a true-crime filmmaker who hits gold with your first project. Then, everything dries up. You can’t find the magic that made your first project so special to true-crime fanatics around the world. Suddenly, you’re allowed to change your fate. There’s something magical about that.

I want to go into more detail about this episode’s story, and we will break the spoiler barrier at this point. The big twist for this episode is that not only is Brad obviously being targeted by Josef, but in a way that’s more sinister than Josef has done before. Josef turns Brad into the killer. What Brad didn’t know is that Josef had cameras set up in specific locations and planned to make Brad appear as a killer. Once Brad realizes this, his whole world falls apart. He, on camera, has become what he wanted to film. What Josef has done here is gorgeously grotesque.

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Besides the great twist, Duplass and Ruben have brilliant chemistry. I feel like I’ve said this many times in my Creep Tapes coverage, but Duplass plays off everyone so well. That’s one of the charms of Duplass and the Creep franchise as a whole. Without an actor as incredible as Duplass, this franchise would not work. His boyish charm plays off his maniacal inner nature in ways that haven’t been captured before.

If The Creep Tapes aren’t automatically greenlit for a second season, someone is making a mistake. These episodes have endless replayability. Each time you watch, you’ll find something new. You will see moments where something clicks in Josef’s head that you missed the first time; you will see when he makes split-second decisions you may have missed. The easiest way to put my thoughts into a phrase is that this franchise is lightning in a bottle.

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The Creep Tapes: “Jeremy” (S1E3)

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Episodes 1 and 2 of The Creep Tapes set a terrifying precedent of murderous mayhem at the hands of Josef (Mark Duplass). We may or may not have learned anything new regarding the canon or lore behind Josef, but we’ve gotten to watch him ‘play with his food’. I still believe that Episode 2, “Elliot,” is the slowest of the episodes thus far, but I’ve slightly come around to the idea of it. One of my best friends told me, “If that’s the worst episode, then we’re in for a treat.” And honestly, that’s the best way I could describe my thoughts on it.

Episode 3, “Jeremy”, takes us out of the wetlands and returns us to a claustrophobic mountain house. “Jeremy” follows our newest victim, Jeremy (Josh Fadem), a ‘gotcha’  internet personality whose whole personality surrounds exposing those he deems needing to be exposed. After his Big Pharma expose, Jeremy finds his sights on Father Tom Durkin (Mark Duplass). Jeremy meets with Father Durkin under the guise of an interview. Little do both of them know…neither is there for what the other thinks.

This episode will probably be a diving episode for fans. I’m personally a big fan of Josh Fadem. His quirky awkwardness is appealing to me. But there’s a chance his schtick will get old quickly for some viewers. The way Fadem and Duplass play off each other is fascinating to watch, and it creates a very compelling dynamic.

Duplass has always given 110% when playing Josef, but he amps it up tenfold in this episode. We get one of the funniest bits in Creep history when Josef/Father Tom Durkin *literally* exercises his demons out. Besides that exercise bit, Father Tom Durkin is one of Josef’s greatest personalities.

If you haven’t seen the episode, I’m about to mention something that is a spoiler, BUT it needs to be discussed. Toward the latter half of the episode, Josef shows Jeremy one of his tapes and uses this to ease Jeremy. The goal of showing him this tape is to give Jeremy his Gotcha moment. See, “Father Tom Durkin” was supposedly possessed and was being exorcised by Father Dom Gurkin. The video we see is of Josef, in his Peachfuzz mask and underwear, cowering in the corner of a small shack while Father Dom Gurkin tries to exorcize the demon from him.

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From what we’ve seen so far, between the first two films and the first two episodes, this is the only evidence that Josef has shown something from his collection to one of his victims. Not only is this idea haunting from Jeremy’s perspective but as a viewer as well. Knowing what we know, this is beyond terrifying. I can only imagine what’s going through Josef’s head while Jeremy is watching this. Will we witness Josef showing other victims tapes at any point?

Episode 3 continues to strike fear into Creep fans and shows no signs of stopping. I still don’t enjoy the credits and think it ruins the immersion (this is a general complaint of opening credits in all found footage) but I’ve come to accept it at this point. I’m happy that Josh Fadem has a character that is canon in the Creep-iverse, and this episode does an excellent job of continuing the legend of Josef. My only real question is, in this age of cell phone pings, how hasn’t he been caught yet?! I’ll continue to suspend my disbelief on that front. With three episodes left in this season, what havoc will Josef wreak on the camera people of this town? Tune in next Friday to find out!

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