There’s something different in the air this Halloween season. Take a deep breath. Elevate your olfactory palate beyond the musty odor of your local haunt. A whiff of perfume? Excellent. And now…poppers? Yes, you’re getting closer! The stench of rotten corpses and toilet bowl cleaner? You’ve got it! The world’s lost all color, and this putrid mixture of scents intrigues us as we spot a grim manor in the distance. We’ve now borne witness to four seasons of murder and mayhem, and it’s about that time of year for another gauntlet of chaos. So, we venture inside in anticipation, our curiosity getting the better of us.
A familiar cackle guides the way, and before long, we’re face to face with our favorite undead goddesses: The Boulet Brothers. The filthy and fabulous duo informs us that we purchased a one-way ticket to the Underworld upon crossing the threshold. Fortunately, not all is lost because we’re just in time for a new game that’ll rattle heaven and hell. Ten of the most devilish Titans to ever disgrace their stage are about to be unearthed, dragged out of oblivion to compete for the ultimate title of the first-ever Dragula Titan and earn a spot once more among the living. Have these ten ghouls evolved enough during their time in infinite darkness to slit the throats of their competitors once more? Let’s strap in for what is sure to be the most epic season of The Boulet Brothers’ Dragula and find out.
Koco Caine: The shadiest titty-shaking icon is back in heart-shaped glasses. Easily the most charismatic Monster of the franchise, Koco’s time was cut short in Season 4, and now she’s ready to prove she’s both easier to work with and more sickening than ever.
Melissa BeFierce: The only OG from Season 1, Melissa is the self-proclaimed queen of the drama and is the longest missing from this earthly realm. With a lot to prove, she’s showing up to read her competition for filth and stomp on their necks. And, of course, she’ll be dripping in all this glamour, hunty.
Evah Destruction: The cuddliest werewolf you’ll ever meet, Evah was a frontrunner on Season 3 who let her inner demons get the upper hand. Done with the tears, this self-assured wolf has shed her skin and is ready to go for the jugular.
Erika Klash: Digital diva and Season 2 extermination queen, Erika is back to show us what’s between her coding. Has she digivolved into the fully formed Titan she claims to be?
Yovska: The shadiest costumed sniper from the side, Yovska has returned with more shade, more creep factor, and more rhinestones. Perhaps we’ll discover what happens when you leave a cursed teddy bear in the Underworld for too long.
Astrud Aurelia: Gone too soon after an infamous Season 4 meltdown, Astrud has matured into a reptilian creature from the gayer side of the black lagoon. One look at their Instagram, and it’s clear we missed out on some exquisite looks last season, so here’s hoping they can bite their forked tongue this go around.
HoSo Terra Toma: A top-four Titan from Season 4 and fresh off the world tour, some question whether HoSo has had enough time for shut-eye between seasons. Drawing from a seemingly endless well of creativity, HoSo insists they now have the necessary experience to match what their horrific mind brings to life on stage.
Abhora: Like a polarizing requel to a beloved franchise, the rewritten Abhora is here, and they’re still a creep! As the only competitor to have ever been simultaneously at the top and bottom of a challenge, Abhora is undoubtedly here to shake up the competition while they claw their way to the crown.
Kendra Onixxx: Having felt like an outsider during her time on Season 2, Kendra has mined her soul and cracked open what is at the heart of her being. She’s back from oblivion and will not take anyone’s BS.
Victoria Black: The formidable queen of prosthetics has returned to annihilate her competition. Having fallen just short of winning Season 2 and Resurrection, Victoria is more willing to express who she is under all that ooze. Could that be all she needs to complete her journey to the throne?
The Challenge: Our ten tremendous Titans have enough time to light the dramatic fuse by questioning whether specific competitors even deserve to be there before being called to the main stage. It’s here that the Titans finally meet their maker – and murderer – and the competition truly begins. The Boulets appear on screen and spill the tea: As ten of the strongest Monsters to ever be featured on The Boulet Brothers’ Dragula, they will compete for a $100,000 grand prize and a headlining spot on the next world tour. The catch – and you knew there’d be one – is that there will be none of the usual Exterminations each week; what this means is TBD, but we love a good surprise. Adding to the agony, the Titans must all participate in each week’s Fright Feat before attempting to defend their spot in the competition. They’ll be immediately cast back into oblivion should they fail or refuse the Feat entirely, and the last soul eliminated will return to the competition. The Boulets didn’t refer to this season as “Gagula” on social media for nothin’.
With formalities out of the way, the season’s first challenge is announced. Our ultimate Uglies must create a terrifying, reinvented drag lewk based on a classic American Halloween costume. They must then execute a choreographed lip sync performance on location at a Spooktacular Halloween House Party. The poor soul who serves more Disney than disaster will find out how exactly a Titan dies. Now, let’s see what these new and improved Fright Feats are.
Per the episode’s Halloween theme, the Titans must bob for apples for their first Fright Feat. And if you think forcing ten queens in big hair and full beat is tragic enough, it gets worse. These apples are submerged in buckets of blood and various animal parts. After watching a grotesque display of gagging ghouls with slicked and bloodied hair, it seems Astrud has won and must assign her fellow Titans their roles for the House Party. The drama doesn’t stop, however, as a crew member enters to inform the cast that a footage recap has revealed Melissa BeFierce as the true winner of the Feat. So, in fierce Melissa style, she immediately undoes all of Astrud’s decisions and casts the roles her way.
The Drama: Baby Gorgeous, this is TITANS, and everyone in the Underworld is seated for the drama. First impressions are over, and these Uglies know each other inside and out – some even know each other’s insides a little too well, it seems. As mentioned earlier, the drama kicks off almost immediately. Evah questions if HoSo has had any time to recoup since the world tour; Yovska wonders if Kendra has what it takes; Abhora reveals they’ve been holding on to years of contempt toward Erika; pretty much everyone agrees that Erika should be sent packing first. The shade and one-liners keep coming, none more so than Kendra’s read of Yovska’s entrance lewk. In a sure-to-be viral moment of absolute ferocity, Kendra compares Yovska to a “Teletubby toilet bowl” and drops the mic. The children are shooketh, and screams have been scrumpt!
Abhora – chaos incarnate – is at the center of much of the episode’s drama. In an interesting choice, they have fully committed to their character and, throughout the entirety of the episode, prove to be an absolute menace. They’re also beak-over-claws in love with HoSo – who may or may not reciprocate the feeling despite idolizing Abhora’s drag – and are at odds with Astrud, who is similarly infatuated with HoSo. Love triangles on day one – isn’t Titans great? Evah also has an issue with her friend Abhora because mere months before starting the show, Abhora intimated that they were quite possibly done with the world of The Boulet Brothers’ Dragula altogether. Yet, here they are, unfazed and very crazed. None of this may bode well for Abhora’s time on the show, but as a viewer, it is pure TV gold.
Competition-wise, the drama is immediately ignited as well. Melissa instantly begins a quest to create an alliance between herself, Kendra, and Koco, which they name the Nightmare Girls (I also personally like Komeldra). Their power quickly materializes when Melissa, the true winner of the Fright Feat, sabotages Astrud’s challenge picks to spite Erika. Koco, realizing the potential of having the legendary Victoria on their side, pushes Melissa to make amends with her (yeah, they’re fighting, too). Abhora and Erika :ahem: clash when they’re chosen to work together as a pair, but the other groups seem to be having a good time creating their floor show performances.
Floor Show & Judgment: The Boulets, sporting chic antennae, enter the stage in person for the first time this season. They introduce guest judges Justin Simien, director of the upcoming Haunted Mansion movie, and Elvira herself, Cassandra Peterson. The floor show begins, and we’re regaled with a campy good time as the cast wiggles and waves to the music in a classic American house party setting. It’s essentially the Spooky Season version of the Nosferatu Beach Party from Season 4, which the Boulets say is one of their favorite challenges from the series.
Astrud (the Creature) hosts the party and bounces from scene to scene with her fellow Titans. Her look is polished, and she does a great job becoming part of each group without feeling forced. Melissa (the Vampire), Koco (the Mummy), and Kendra (Frankenstein) are hit-and-miss while they dance in the living room as the Nightmare Girls. Melissa proves to be the best of the group, while Koco flounders with a messy and basic costume despite making us crack the hell up with her titty-shaking performance, and Kendra has a few cute moments without doing enough to stand out. The trio escapes performing the worst of the evening, though, because Abhora (as ???) and Erika (the Bat) have arrived. Erika does an okay job of camping it up and dancing in her fur lewk but doesn’t necessarily wow. Unfortunately, she bares the weight of their group performance because Abhora is absolutely atrocious. Her costume, which she later explains is meant to be an alien, is entirely indiscernible, and she doesn’t remember the lip sync words half the time. Eek, indeed.
Evah (the Devil) looks stunning in her scenes with HoSo (the Pirate). The duo owns their power over a Ouija board in the bedroom, and Evah especially lets her inner sexpot shine. Yovska (Pumpkinhead) and Victoria (Pumpkinhead II) kill it in the kitchen as two freakish pumpkin queens. Each of their looks is unique and true to themselves. Yovska does excellent work showing off her cartoonish pumpkin breasts and highlighting her facial features despite being in full costume, and Victoria, quite simply, slays the competition. From head to toe, she is high pumpkin couture and her mouth, which genuinely looks like that of a sinister old witch, is nightmare fuel. To top it off, she literally removes the upper crust of her head and displays the icky, gooey guts of a pumpkin. Iconic!
Astrud and Victoria are neck and neck to be the week’s winner, but as Pumpkinhead II, Victoria receives the win. Astrud clearly has a lot to show us, and if she had won this challenge, her Season 4 curse might have reared its ugly head, so perhaps it’s for the best. Unsurprisingly, Abhora and Erika receive the worst critiques, and Koco is not far behind due to her bare-bones toilet paper mummy.
Deliberation: They called it “Gagula” and, ghoulie, they weren’t kidding. Remember when they said there wouldn’t be any typical Exterminations this season? Well, that’s because the Titans must vote on who the bottom two of the week are. Anyone is up for grabs, not simply those with the worst critiques. Alliances, alliances…clearly Melissa was on to something. Abhora is visibly distraught about her placement and pulls an Astrud, self-destructing and making enemies with almost everyone in the room. The voting begins, and the Titans decide their fate. A special shout-out goes to Koco for leaving us in stitches once again as she attempts to write Abhora’s name down with her comically large nails.
The votes are finalized, and Abhora and Erika are the unlucky chosen two. Some would argue that Koco deserved to take Erika’s spot, but it would be blasphemy to send such an entertaining powerhouse home so soon. The duo is made to ascent the Staircase of Souls to the Ghostly Gallery, where they await their fate. With one word, “ABHORA,” Swanthula banishes them back to whence they came, and Abhora falls through a trap door. The ghouls are gagged at the surprising form of elimination, and the camera pans as we see Abhora’s portrait apparate on the wall beside them.
Quote of the Episode: “What do you look like, girl? A moon. A moon with a toilet. Toilet bowl. Toilet bowl. It’s giving me Teletubbies on a toilet bowl. Flush the toilet. Bloopbloopbloopbloop. Done.” – Kendra Onixxx destroying Yovska’s soul.
Honorable Mention: Yovska showed up this week with her tri-pumpkinhead lewk. One critique they’ve had in the past is our inability to see beyond the costume, but her facial work really shone through this week. Overall, a win for the shady Titan.
Rating: The Boulet Brothers’ Dragula Titans is back with a vengeance. Now with an innate appreciation for all the contestants, it’s a joy to watch them return for our viewing pleasure. The heightened drama is there from the jump, fun new segues are peppered throughout the episode, twists and turns await around every corner, and the show introduces even more proper nouns to add to the series’ wiki page. (10/10 Teletubby toilet bowl meme retweets)