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Provincetown Sadness: A Spoiler-Free ‘Saint Drogo’ Review

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The beautiful minds at Monster Makeup Productions, responsible for your favorite Giallo drag queen slasher, Death Drop Gorgeous, debut their sophomore feature with another queer take on the horror genre. Co-written by Michael J. Ahern and Brandon Perras and directed by the pair along with Ryan Miller, Saint Drogo is a surrealist fable that pulls no punches regarding its criticisms of homogenized queer culture. It’s the logical next step in their burgeoning oeuvre, showcasing a signature blend of quiet rage and grotesque practical effects that would make any gorehound flinch. The boys are back in P-Town, and this time it feels personal.

Ahern and Perras take the lead as Adrian and Caleb, a couple whose strained relationship battles the everyday expectations society throws at us as we mature. As if by fate, Caleb receives a mysterious photo from his recently estranged ex, who has taken up year-round residence in Provincetown, Massachusetts, after a seemingly iconic summer by the sea. Since the couple desperately needs a getaway to reframe and reignite their relationship – and primarily due to Caleb’s curiosity about said ex – the two venture off to spend a weekend in the famous gay hotspot during its infamously dour off-season. What follows is a melancholic descent into paranoia and group sex as we discover what happens when the boys are away, and the locals are left to play.

Whereas Death Drop Gorgeous was a campy and slashery take on Showgirls that centered around the drag scene, Saint Drogo is a sultry mix of Eyes Wide Shut and 2018’s Suspiria. It takes DDG’s introspection on the darker side of queer culture and maximizes the scope, holding a mirror to ourselves and questioning if our journey into the mainstream has neutered the creative and artistic expression we hold dearly. Throughout the 1900s, Provincetown became a haven for the arts and its LGBTQ+ patrons. Today, the focus has shifted, and a white-robed figure meant to symbolize the real-life Saint Drogo – patron saint of shepherds and (iced) coffee – leads P-Town’s flock astray from its creative roots. These compelling themes are where the film shines, and its grounded characters add a well of depth.

Ahern, especially, embodies the internal struggle of being caught between the tides of queer culture with a deep sadness and returning MVP Payton St. James knocks it out of the park in a supporting role that unravels into the film’s deeper meanings. The plot, however, doesn’t go to as many unexpected places, and while a more intricate journey may have pushed Saint Drogo to further heights, the glow-up is real for Monster Makeup Productions. DDG’s Giallo hues trade themselves in for sweeping drone shots of Provincetown’s coastline, and the film’s striking imagery will leave you caught in its fever dream.

And it wouldn’t be a Monster Makeup feature without buckets of nausea-inducing gore. The practical effects on display are next-level, maintaining realism while simultaneously becoming more and more outrageous. One gory edit, in particular, comes off without a hitch, and another monstrous feat of prosthetics gives Universal Studios a run for its money. Without getting into spoilers, all this gore elevates Saint Drogo beyond the initial gross-out factor we seek from horror. They manage to evoke actual emotion from the ooey-gooey when it counts the most, and if this is what Monster Makeup is to be known for, they are surely only just getting started.

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A poignant, if not heavy-handed, epilogue closes out the film and further highlights the dilution of a group rich in individualism and agency. While queer culture operates by its own set of standards and practices outside of heteronormative society, there are specific rules and assumptions it just as strictly follows. Unconditional love has a few conditions, it seems. So while Saint Drogo may not astound you with its plot, its gutting evaluation of modern queer culture will undoubtedly shock you with its boldness. When you’re a tourist in your own community, it’s lonely on the outside looking in, but so rewarding if you find the right people to do it with. It appears that the ghouls at Monster Makeup Productions have.

Alex Warrick is a film lover and gaymer living the Los Angeles fantasy by way of an East Coast attitude. Interested in all things curious and silly, he was fearless until a fateful viewing of Poltergeist at a young age changed everything. That encounter nurtured a morbid fascination with all things horror that continues today. When not engrossed in a movie, show or game he can usually be found on a rollercoaster, at a drag show, or texting his friends about smurfs.

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[REVIEW] ‘Fear Street: Prom Queen’ It’s Not Great…

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I was obsessed with Fear Street as a kid. I still have my collection of the popular YA horror detailing the murder and mayhem in Shadyside. These books have moved around the country with me. I even secretly hope to adapt a few of them for the screen someday. So, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I have to tell you that Fear Street: Prom Queen is a strong contender for the worst movie to hit streaming (so far) this year. Here is our review of Fear Street: Prom Queen.

I felt Netflix’s 2021 Fear Street trilogy, helmed by Leigh Janiak, was okay. We had some great kills, it added intersectional lead characters as canon, and the soundtrack was a banger. Did it feel more like a project that was moved to Fear Street rather than an adaptation of any of my beloved books? Yes. Was it the worst thing that could have happened to the beloved series? No.

However, I could not help getting more excited for this fourth installment. Mainly because the title Fear Street: Prom Queen is so close to Fear Street: The Prom Queen. It gave my nerd heart hope that we would finally see one of the actual books on screen. However, we rarely get what we want in life.

A Disappointing 1988 Vibe

Fear Street: Prom Queen does take place during prom season. It does have a group of high school girls who want the crown for various reasons. We even eventually get around to some underwhelming murders. However, this 1988 moment left a lot to be desired. When it opens with the synth music and the 1980s high school, giving us Stranger Things vibes, I knew it would be different than anything that came before.

I quickly made peace with that and gave the first act grace, even when it started to experience turbulence. Not only is this installment bad, but it also undoes all of the goodwill the first three movies built with the audience. The characters feel one note, the pacing never finds the gas pedal, and by the time it got to the revealsI wanted to take a nap. 

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Fear Street: Prom Queen and its One Dimensional Cast

We follow Lori (India Fowler), an outcast at her school who has been nominated for Prom Queen. As our narrator, she gives us the one-dimensional descriptions of everyone else. This includes her best friend Megan (Suzanna Son), who Lori tells us is a stoner and horror nerd.

We quickly realize Megan is also a Queer sidekick as this movie will not be following in the predecessor’s footsteps. There will be no queer Black characters at the front this time. Anyway, part of Lori’s deal is the town hates her mother because of mysterious events that transpired at her prom while she was pregnant with Lori.

This wild speculation and gossip has become the gospel that haunts Lori. It is also ammunition for her bully and prom queen competition, Tiffany (Fina Strazza).

Tiffany is one of the many characters that could be more interesting. However, the writing and direction will not let her be great. Each time she corners Lori to torment her with an exposition-filled monologue in whispered tones, I wondered if this was really the best option.

The way Tiffany runs her squad and twists the verbal knife into her bestie’s heart gives glimmers of a more interesting villain. Sadly, Fear Street: Prom Queen forces her also to be one-dimensional.

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The project also wastes Lili Taylor as Vice Principal Dolores Brekenridge. A woman who demands law and order in her school but is just a stock character. However, at least it allows the actor to stop the whole affair from being a complete flatline.

My fellow millennials will also get a kick out of seeing Chris Klein as Dan Falconer. Dan is a teacher at the high school who happens to also be Tiffany’s dad. He might also have the silliest character arc of anyone in this situation. 

The Killer in Fear Street: Prom Queen

Lackluster Kills with No Tension

One of the things Fear Street (the books and the first three films) has going for them is the kills. Not only do teens die, but also the rest of the teens have to carry on as their classmates get turned into charcuterie.

Fear Street: Prom Queen opted out of all of that. The first kill is an uninspired axe to the shoulder. There was no fight, no struggle or chase. Just a whimper of a weapon going into someone’s back while they look off into the night. That aspiring prom queen is a drug dealer, so a few people ask about her, but no one really looks for her. Any hope that Christy’s (Ariana Greenblatt) whimper of a death scene would not set the tone is dashed at the prom.

Matt Palmer’s direction never allows for any tension building. This would not necessarily be a bad thing if Fear Street: Prom Queen ever found a rhythm. Or at least picked up the pace during the kills. However, they are all as slow and uninspired as the rest of the movie. Co-writers Palmer and Donald Mcleary never gave any of the characters a chance to have texture.

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So, none of the deaths have weight on top of the killer just appearing next to the victims as if by magic. They also never got out of their way long enough to let the story do anything interesting or avoid being so formulaic. So, the few times they think they are surprising the audience falls flat.

Formulaic Storytelling and Flat Reveals

Each killer reveal was somehow equally ridiculous, expected, and underwhelming. This makes Lori’s fight for survival too tepid for us to root for her when she gets her final girl moment. 

I tried to gaslight myself into saying the movie was going for camp. After all, Tiffany and Lori have a weird dance-off to Gloria (a 1982 anthem) during the prom when things get too heated. However, as the entire runtime felt like a rehearsal instead of a performance, I might never know what the tone was supposed to be.

Sadly, I stopped trying to understand the mess and endured because that is my job. I finish things and tell people what I saw, and if I think it is worth watching. With great displeasure, I must tell you that Fear Street: Prom Queen feels like CW and Tubi had a baby behind a Radio Shack in hell. Not in a fun and chaotic way. More like the people didn’t understand the assignment and assumed their audience does not have standards.

A Letdown for Fear Street and Slasher Fans

I did not have a good time with Fear Street: Prom Queen and would like my time back. I love slashers and the books the movie is allegedly inspired by. So, I hate that it fails in both lanes.  It especially hurts because the Fear Street books are right there in all their fun glory.

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While this did not capture any of the thrills of my favorite parts of the series, it did force me to find even more ways to appreciate the 2021 Netflix trilogy. It was not the Fear Street of our youth, but it got a few things right. Also, it at least gave horror fans something to talk about.

So, it really sucks to see this one campaigning for a spot at the bottom of the discount bin. 

Fear Street: Prom Queen is now available on Netflix.

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[Review] ‘Bring Her Back’ A Gut-Wrenching Horror Masterpiece

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Let’s just say the Philippou brothers are about to commit highway robbery on A24’s budgeting department for the foreseeable future. The sophomore feature film of the former YouTube celebs, Bring Her Back, lands the guys a heavy two-for-two after their directorial debut. 

Bring Her Back: A Triumphant Follow-Up From Philippou Brothers

As cute and carefree as these guys are in conversation, we’d never believe the trauma Danny and Michael Philippou were about to drum up with their grief-soaked house party, Talk To Me. Representing the new generation of horror, much of the film’s praise circled around their ability to add an accurate adolescence to the low vibrational theme of loss.

Their playfulness as a duo hasn’t budged, but the twins’ newest project swaps out any source of teenage nostalgia for an extra helping of domestic dread.

It’s “feel bad “o’clock”, alright. Bring Her Back sits at the stoop of the disturbing side of extreme cinema, similar to Red Rooms or Speak No Evil (2022)– just add a gallon of the bloody stuff.

Sora Wong and Billy Barratt Shine as Siblings in Bring Her Back

The film follows Andy and Piper, siblings who are quickly placed into nightmare foster care after the sudden death of their only parent. It’s felt instantly that the innocence of these characters is about to be challenged in ways the viewer might not be ready for. The bond between Sora Wong as Piper, and Billy Barratt as her brother, Andy, is tangible. The audience will feel how the series of events stretches and disrupts their chemistry from its origin, through its conflict, to the lasting impact of its third act.

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Piper is the younger sister. She’s visually impaired, and a victim of bullying at school. Billy is almost 18, and after years of abuse, prioritizes protecting his step-sister from the household horrors that come with adolescence. The desolation is boosted with Sally Hawkins in the role of Laura; the kids’ new foster parent. Personally, I’m thankful Hawkins retired from her career of serving comfort charisma in the Paddington series for something complex and dangerous.

Her newest role is a little relatable… and likable for a little? All around it’s demented. Laura’s fallen into immense emptiness after losing her daughter, but found a seemingly reasonable solution in providing care for kids in need, like her current foster child, Oliver. At least that’s what her alibi tells us.

Weaponizing Empathy in a Horror Movie

The amount of humanity all over this is disturbing. Care is a theme, but it’s really a gag that anyone with an ounce of empathy is subject to trip over. The facade of a safe space lets in the manipulation. The only “what if?” comes from the ability to accept a stranger’s care in a time of struggle. The Philippou’s are wicked to use our human empathy against us.

Sora Wong’s debut performance carries a lot of hope to Piper, which is basically the viewer’s lifeline. Her visual impairment makes little impact on the situation, especially because she has all of the characteristics of a role that horror fans typically hold on to, especially with the weight of this context. Hopefully the young actor finds a taste for horror in her career moving forward.

Practical Effects and Body Horror Steal the Show

The physical horrors I witnessed are some of the worst things you can do to an audience. I honestly wish y’all luck getting this stuff out of your head (complimentary). The first foster child, Oliver, puts all the current creepy children in horror to bed. As strange as Laura gets, he is the conduit of the supernatural element. Jonah Wren Phillips nailing the classic “creepy kid” thing makes him the perfect subject for Philippou’s display of practical effects. The body horror sequences are traumatizing; they last forever, and you’ll hear twice as much as you see, but they’re worth every cent spent in production. These moments make for excellent theater experiences, but I also understand if you’d rather watch at home and sob a little too.

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Simply put, Bring Her Back weighs a thousand tons. Somehow, it’s able to complement massive amounts of grief with the kind of practical and emotional depravity you rarely see in a wide release. We are so far from the gateway, folks, so take your trigger warnings seriously.

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