Reviews
‘M3GAN’ Review: M0th3r Has Arrived
She’s M3gan, but after a viral marketing campaign that had everyone, including your favorite aunt, calling her “Mother,” you already knew that. Directed by Gerard Johnstone (Housebound), with a story by Malignant duo James Wan and Akela Cooper (who also penned the script), this meme has quite the pedigree. The hype train is real, and while M3GAN does an excellent job at sprinkling in iconic moments and one-liners while maintaining a relatable thematic throughline, it does so at the expense of a compelling plot. Its charm, however, is that despite containing story beats you can clock by watching the trailer, M3GAN is simply too much fun to care.
M3GAN’s Story: A Familiar Yet Fun Plot
The film follows newly orphaned Cady (Violet McGraw, a young Daveigh Chase doppelgänger) as she goes to live with her quintessentially millennial aunt Gemma (Allison Williams), a brilliant roboticist working at a toy company. Parenting does not come naturally to the detached and overworked Gemma. So, in the only way she knows, Gemma pawns off the responsibility of helping Cady cope with the death of her parents – as well as conveniently enacting live-in nanny status – to her passion project, the true to size and pussy bow-clad AI companion M3gan. Her plan works until it doesn’t, and everything goes gloriously haywire. If you think you’ve seen it before, you almost certainly have, but this familiar story is in drag.
Those memes were not a fluke, and she’s here to make it clear: M3gan cuts deep. She knows just what to say to make you second guess everything you’ve ever done, and her one-two punch carries enough whiplash to leave you in a coma or worse. She’s a dancer, a singer, a quadrupedal runner, a killer, and a friend. The film’s fusion of practical effects and CGI brings M3gan to life just short of Avatar photorealism, and voice actor Jenna Davis – no stranger to going viral – has mastered the art of feigned innocence. Gemma, M3gan’s creator and rival, does her best at holding her ground against the doll as they vie for Cady’s affection. Williams has snagged another significant horror role, playing the worst millennial you’ll ever meet (Marnie from Girlsincluded) as the Cindy Lauper of Dr. Frankensteins – she just wants kids to have fun. And while M3GAN is relatively low on actual horror stakes, one scene during the film’s climax sees the pair facing off at the dining table in a moment fraught with genuine tension.
Dark Comedy: M3GAN’s Secret Weapon
Given that M3GAN’s actual Dr. Frankensteins are behind Malignant and Housebound, it’s no surprise that dark comedy is its greatest asset. It is deadly unserious most of the time. When your grin might begin to lose grip, M3gan sings an acapella lullaby of David Guetta and Sia’s “Titanium” or casually flings her latest victim’s ear over her shoulder. The laughs are a mixture of camp, subtle, and satirical. Lazy parenting, suburban living, and the carelessness of technological advancement are all up for grabs, and no collectible toy is safe from Allison Williams’ scissors.
It is to Akela Cooper’s credit that M3GAN can bob and weave through such a riotous tale of a killer doll while not losing focus on its ideas about our unhealthy digital reliance and even poignantly touching upon childhood grief. As if the projectionist accidentally spliced in some Saturday morning cartoons, M3GAN opens with a commercial for the fictional “Purrpetual Petz,” a traditionally annoying toy not unlike Furbys of the 1990s. This idea of a forever companion, whether in the form of an exotic creature, a 4’4” sassy android, or even an iPad, informs our prevalent lack of connection to other humans. Whether used as a means to avoid reality or as parenting by proxy, M3gan is that digital crutch personified. Before you know it, she’s an inseparable “part of the family.” What happens when we lose that connection to our versions of M3gan? If Cady’s actions are anything to go by, we become indignant Veruca Salts of Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory fame. Cooper isn’t exaggerating, that’s for sure.
M3GAN’s Flaws: A Predictable Horror Flick
However, this wild ride has pitfalls. If you were to de-drag M3GAN, the film’s bones are that of your stereotypical January throw-away horror flick. There’s no guessing how it will play out – although one of its final scenes does include a nice nod to Aliens – and while I enjoyed myself, I did not leave the theater absolutely gagging as expected. When the action hits its stride, and a lovely needle drop begins the third act, M3GAN does not go as hard as I hoped. I hate to add fire to the flames, but while there are fantastic PG-13 horror films, one as biting as M3GAN deserves a hard R rating. In fact, in a recent LA Times interview, Cooper let the cat out of the bag and said the film had been edited down to PG-13 after its marketing went viral and the suits wanted to cash in on the TikTok crowd. It’s a shame because as M3gan devolves into a sadistic killer, that cold AI side of her gets very dark and twisty.
Philosophical Undertones
M3gan’s dark side definitely ponders her existential Westworld fantasy throughout the film’s runtime. While Child’s Play is the obvious comparison point, I could not help but find some Jurassic Park philosophizing in there as well. The unintended consequences of our creations through state-of-the-art technology feel like a not-so-distant reality. We may not see dinosaurs in our lifetime, but Teslas are combusting on the streets as you read this, and we have created innate digital addiction as a disease of the human race. On a macro level, we could bring about the End Times as we are all dramatically slayed by agile android dolls. To quote Dr. Ian Malcolm: “Yeah, but your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn’t stop to think if they should.”
Why M3GAN Shines Despite Its Flaws
Ultimately, M3GAN succeeds in so many ways that it deserves its time in the sun. It may not be the taut techno-thriller of your dreams, but it’s a great way to ring in horror for 2023. Most will know if the film’s humor is for them after one glance at its trailer and marketing, and if you’re on the fence, just dive in. At best, you’ll cackle along with the crowd, and at worst, you’ll probably install one of those screen time management apps on your phone. There is, of course, a wink toward a potential sequel by its conclusion and one unresolved plot thread that would allow a revisit to expand upon the film’s themes in a big way. Plus, there’s the inevitable M3gan/Chucky/Esther/Annabelle pint-sized villain throwdown event the powers-that-be would be fools to ignore.
Spoiler Alert: M3gan would end them.
Make sure you check out our review for M3gan 2.0 next!
There are countless subgenres within subgenres for horror, and one that feels underutilized is workplace horror. Unless you’re one of the lucky few, most people wake up at some point during the day, go to work, and then come home. It’s one of the few things in life that’s nearly unavoidable. While there are countless real-life examples of workplace violence, seeing exaggerated forms of it in film can still be fun. When I pitched covering The Belko Experiment for this month, I actually thought I was pitching Joe Lynch’s Mayhem. I soon found out how incorrect I had been, but figured I’d go along with it anyway.
Mike Milch (John Gallagher Jr.) and 79 of his coworkers are locked inside the towering building they come to work in every day in Bogotá, Colombia. They’re given simple instructions: murder two coworkers within the next half hour. When they fail that task, coworkers’ heads start blowing up left and right. When they’re given the next task, kill 30 people in two hours, they take it…a little more seriously.
The Belko Experiment’s Brutal Premise Sets Up High Stakes
Written by James Gunn and directed by Wolf Creek creator Greg McLean, The Belko Experiment is a painfully by-the-numbers film that offers little more than a handful of entertaining kills. Its futile attempts at commentary regarding work/life balance or just how bad “faceless” upper management is fall so flat it’s comical. Nothing like multi-millionaire James Gunn telling me how awful it is to have to work a real job for a living. Great work. And its one-dimensional characters do little more than create a slight sigh of relief when they’re dispatched without regard.
A singular attempt at cleverness is broached from the beginning when we see a colony of ants in an ant farm on someone’s desk. Oh, look at that, these workers are nothing more than mindless ants! But any attempt at following that slightly clever idea is quickly thrown away. At one point, Barry Norris (Tony Goldwyn), the big boss in the office, attempts to group up who should and shouldn’t be killed; who has the most value outside of work. Gunn had the perfect opportunity to make Barry a deep and more sinister antagonist. If Barry had grouped people into sets from most to least profitable for the company, we would have something. It would show that Barry is a forward-thinking villain who is trying to suck up to the people who get paid even MORE than him!
Missed Opportunities for a Smarter Corporate Villain
I’ll do you one better. After all of that, what if the bad guys that Barry recruited to help him cull his subordinates realized they were just pawns in the game of Big Business? So then they attempt to repent by killing Barry in the hopes that they can find a common means of escape from this hell? Why is there zero attempt at making an interesting story other than this shitty, watered-down Battle Royale with people we don’t give a shit about? Instead of anything interesting, we’re just given a group of baddies who try to get into the security office’s gun safe. The only reason we’re slightly scared of the “bad guys” is because they’re bad guys.
The only slightly interesting performances we get are from David Dastmalchian and Adria Arjona, even if it might be a fluke. As someone who is a fan of Greg McLean and the Wolf Creek series, something just felt disconnected about nearly every aspect of The Belko Experiment. I’ve brought it up before that sometimes it’s okay to have a film that doesn’t tell a great story as long as the kills can carry some of the weight. But to say this film has a story is laughable, and that carries over to how flat this film looks.
Skip The Belko Experiment and Watch Mayhem Instead
It’s weird how sour this film left me. When I was watching it, I found myself grimacing at some of the kills. And I didn’t vehemently dislike it as much as this review would suggest. But as I sat there and thought longer, I just couldn’t wrap my head around what anyone sees in this. Mayhem is an all-around better film that tackles this same subject but in a much better way. So if you ever decide to sit down and watch The Belko Experiment, maybe go watch Mayhem on Shudder instead.
Would it be a month of coverage on Horror Press if I didn’t bring up at least one aughts film? I know the curator of all things Horror Press, James-Michael, is shaking his fists at the sky and cursing the fact that he approved me covering The Hitcher. Of all the remakes that were so pervasive throughout the aughts, The Hitcher is one that slipped completely under my radar. And that’s a damn shame. It wouldn’t be until I found a DVD copy at Bookoff that I finally got the opportunity to watch it. Hot damn, the critics really got it wrong here.
The Hitcher: A Road Trip Turned Nightmare
Jim Halsey (Zachary Knighton) and his girlfriend Grace Andrews (Sophia Bush) are on a road trip to Lake Havasu in Jim’s gorgeous Oldsmobile 442. An unfortunate run-in with a mysterious hitchhiker, John Ryder (Sean Bean), Jim and Grace find themselves in a fight for life and death. Only, John isn’t their only concern. With the 5-0 hot on their tails, Jim and Grace must escape from a psychopathic man with a death wish and the hot-tempered, hot-faced Lieutenant Esteridge (Neal McDonough). As the odometer grows, so does the body count.
The Hitcher is one of those remakes that does not have the approval of the original’s lead, Rutger Hauer. Which is astounding to me. Sure, the original is good. But it doesn’t set itself apart from the crowd too much. Rutger Hauer’s John is slightly more reserved, and while he has an edge to him, I don’t necessarily find him overly menacing. (Don’t kill me.) Sean Bean’s John Ryder, on the other hand, is furiously terrifying. There’s no question that there are tons of issues with the Platinum Dunes remake, though, for me, the pros significantly outweigh the cons.
Jim Halsey Falls Flat
The biggest issue is the character of Jim Halsey. I love how the roles of Jim and Grace are swapped from the original film. It brings an updated, modern edge to the film and is a great way to throw audiences who have seen the original. Though I can imagine the hyper-masculine fans of the original were not too happy with that. When it was decided to swap the roles of the characters, it seems like any character depth for Jim was thrown out of the window. I think Zachary Knighton is a wonderful actor who does the best with what he has, but he doesn’t have enough to work with. Writers Eric Red, Jake Wade Wall, and Eric Bernt updated the film with tons of epic scenarios and moments, while seemingly forgetting to make the supposed lead of the film interesting.
On top of cardboard Jim, the inciting police incident just feels very forced. Grace runs into a diner, covered in blood, after she and Jim found a family butchered by John. Someone from the diner calls the police, which leads to Jim and Grace being arrested and charged with murder. Whether or not that’s supposed to be commentary on rural police doesn’t matter because it completely fails to do anything other than forcibly push the story forward.
Besides that? I hate to say, but I don’t have many issues with The Hitcher.
Soundtrack and Atmosphere: A High-Octane Experience
First and foremost, The Hitcher’s soundtrack is incredible. We start the film with Move Along by The All-American Rejects. Talk about a shot of adrenaline. And the greatest needle drop in all of aughts horror history is Nine Inch Nails’s Closer during the film’s most wild car chase. It’s hard not to get lost in this film when the music kicks in.
What really sells this film is how intensely they handle the violence and the film’s gorgeous chase scenes. It’s no Death Proof, but these scenes are miles above the Fast movies that were out at this time. In a day and age where chase scenes are overly produced, badly edited, and just plain boring, The Hitcher manages to infuse horror and action in a way that probably won’t be seen again. Watching films like The Hitcher makes me sad for the state of modern cinema. The Hitcher wasn’t made to win scores of Oscars; it was made by people passionate about telling a badass, harrowing story (minus Jim). And they greatly excel at that.
The Hitcher Is a Misunderstood Cult Favorite
The Hitcher falls in line with my running theory of post-9/11 ultra violence. We were a nation scared of what happened, what was happening, and what seemed to be on the horizon–The Hitcher bottles that fear and anger, packaging it into a nasty piece of genre. Sean Bean and Sophia Bush are an on-screen match made in heaven. They wade through harsh lighting, thick film grain, and buckets of blood to deliver a film that critics and audiences unfairly panned. While audiences may have moved along, I sure didn’t. I want to exist in a world of nothing but aughts genre films, but am forced to live in a world of elevated horror. Le sigh.
