Using the often-frightening realities of aging as horror is nothing new. Bodily ailments, brain fog, dementia, Alzheimer’s, incontinence, and sundowning have been used in the horror genre for better or worse, with most films using it as nightmare fuel for younger audiences. Horror is cathartic, and one can find films in the genre to safely see the results of aging and work out the issues that come with a fear of aging and death. Unfortunately, where does this leave the aged? The genre has covered a wide breadth of issues with regard to specific individual experiences, i.e., homophobia, racism, and ableism. However, there is a glaring lack of content for older fans of the genre, leaving aging characters on screen as fodder for younger audiences for humor and fear.
The Visit (2015): Ageism and Mental Ableism
The Visit (2015) follows two siblings meeting their grandparents for the first time. While they try their best to be supportive and understanding toward their physically and mentally ailing grandparents, the true fear of the film is a fear of what happens when you get old, how it affects those around you, and how it can scare the shit out of kids, seeing conditions such as sundowning and incontinence up close and for the first time. What is unique about The Visit is the sympathy these kids have for their ailing grandparents while simultaneously being terrified of what they are subjected to see. There is heart to The Visit. However, the quintessential Shyamalan “twist” cools the heart by the film’s end and furthers ageism and mental ableism in horror cinema.
Horror’s Neglect of Older Audiences
My grandfather is in his eighties and has not seen a horror movie since the 1950s. He simply does not enjoy horror. While this is just one personal example, it seems like there just isn’t much to offer plot-wise for older audiences. The genre has been dominated by teens for decades. It also does not help that the genre often places older adults in sinister roles, sometimes using their afflictions and experiences as humor or horror. They are seldom the protagonists or heroes. Clearly, seniors and older adults are the least of the genre’s worries with regard to box office sales.
The Visit’s Fearful Depiction of Aging
When I watched The Visit for the first time, while I truly enjoyed the film, I felt it used older adults’ conditions mainly for fear fodder. Yes, the children of the film sympathize with them, but there is a disconnect that I could never shake. And this is all due to the twist ending.
Young teens Becca and Tyler are determined to get to know their estranged grandparents. With their mom’s permission, they make their way to Nana and Pop-Pop’s house to spend time with them while their mother Loretta is away. Once at the secluded farmhouse, strange events begin to jar the siblings: Nana walks the halls at night, naked, clawing at the walls; Tyler discovers Pop-Pop’s hidden pile of soiled adult diapers in the shed; and the grandparents warn the kids not to go out of their room at night. The film’s tone becomes more sinister when Nana encourages Becca to get into the oven to clean it, like the witch in Hansel & Gretel.
Unfortunately, while the grandparents explain that Nana suffers from sundowning, a condition linked to dementia and Alzheimer’s in older adults, and Pop-Pop from fecal incontinence, these realities for millions of older adults are used to shock audiences and get them prepared for the Shyamalan twist: Becca and Tyler’s real grandparents were murdered by Nana and Pop-Pop, who escaped from a mental hospital and took the place of hospital volunteers, Loretta’s real parents. Once revealed, everything begins to unravel: the unhinged older couple attack Becca and Tyler, and the siblings are forced to fight back, brutally killing their captors.
Ageism in The Visit
Becca and Tyler never knew their “grandparents” as loved ones or saw them in their prime. While the film is haunting and sometimes silly, it paints aging in an unfavorable light. The strange behavior of the grandparents is more reminiscent of Grimm’s fairytales (remember the oven?). How might this film impact how kids treat a grandparent or loved one with memory problems, who suffers from the effects of sundowning, or incontinence? Will it be chalked up to, “Can someone else help them? This behavior scares me”? While a provoking film and no doubt a fun ride as a horror movie, it worries me to think about all those who saw this movie and will see it, and feel disconnected from older adults, fearful of what they might say or do as they age.
Children and Aging: Bridging the Disconnect
Witnessing the confusion, deterioration, and frustration associated with aging can be challenging for a child, and comprehending just what older adults are going through can feel foreign. The Visit rests on the fright and confusion of Becca and Tyler. It is through their eyes that we experience Nana and Pop-Pop. This film leaves the feelings of older adults out of the equation (though throughout, we are made to feel bad for Nana and Pop-Pop’s various conditions, that is, until their motives are truly revealed). Feeling your body and mind change and betray you after decades of solidity must be excruciating. Without the twist of The Visit, this story is about children trying to connect with older adults/seniors, yet the disconnect is quite clear. Why do we seldom talk and explain to children how to properly deal with the changes associated with older adulthood? What can we do to prepare children for the eventuality that they may have to support the older adults in their families and communities?
Supporting Older Adults: Tips for Empathy
Some helpful tips on how to help older adults find comfort during difficult mind and body changes appeared in my research, but one of the most important ways to support is to maintain a sense of dignity. Many aspects of aging can be embarrassing: memory lapses, disrupted bathroom routines, and nighttime confusion and restlessness. Navigating how to approach difficult conversations or assistance can be challenging, especially for children. Patience is key in making older adults feel comfortable asking for help or confiding in you when dealing with something private.
When navigating dementia or an Alzheimer’s diagnosis, research is one of your best tools: learn what helps and what doesn’t, know the signs, and get a sense of just how common some conditions of aging are. Most importantly, be patient and kind. Speak with your older loved ones who are struggling. Ask how they are doing, and if there is anything specific they need more help with, but also respect their decision not to disclose their conditions openly.
Building Better Relationships with Seniors
The Visit is complicated, but your relationship with an older loved one does not have to be. The following sources from the National Institute on Aging and the Mayo Clinic go into detail about the various ailments showcased in the film, as well as some helpful tips for making older adults feel seen, heard, and understood.